Rick Scott wrote:
> In the course of writing up a paper for a philosophy course some
> time ago, one of the interesting things that came up is the claim
> that men tend to `dominate' conversations -- they speak for more
> of the time and interrupt more often.
Good discussion topic. :)
> Online, woman-only fora
> are (the claim goes) are frequently subject to invasion by
> flame-spouting jerks who are apparently angered by the forum's
> existence.
That and similar things happened to the issues list when it
started - we would be burling along discussing something of
great interest to us, and someone (frequently/usually male) would
come along and EITHER troll us, angry that Linuxchix existed, or
ask out of apparently GENUINE interest, something very basic (even
'why does this forum exist') which would stop the other discussion
in its tracks.
Even though I felt annoyed at the second cases, I'd try to help
them understand. Eventually, that turned into the issues FAQ -
because, dammit, I wanted to discuss the OTHER stuff.
(The first cases, if they were obviously-enough not discourteous
people with genuine interest, would just get ignored.)
Unfortunately, we've not gotten back to the various topics we
were discussing. :( Hrm.
All of this is documented in the archives of the list...
> I have no doubt that a fair deal of this goes on, and too much in any
> case. Empirically, I pay more attention to my own conversations
> and Auto-LART myself if I catch myself interrupting.
It happens.
Before we noticed what was happening, technical discusssions between
Dancer and I would consist of him lecturing me, me impatiently waiting
to say something, I open my mouth, he has a 'good idea', interrupts,
lectures me again, I wind up screaming at him for no apparent reason....
We BOTH hated it. Then we found out that he was assuming I'd interrupt
him if I had something to say, and *I* was assuming that he'd leave me
space to speak in.
We BOTH needed to retrain ourselves. It's not solely the males' fault -
but it is the male who has the active role, and active is easier to
retrain than passive. Or seems to be. Maybe it isn't - who can say?
> (Needless to say, the fact that I find *myself* doing this drives me
> up the fscking wall. People get confused when I interrupt them, and
> then interrupt myself...)
Heh. It's part of the process, though. From watching Dancer, you'll
start interrupting yourself before you even open your mouth. Eventually.
> I'm pretty new here, and don't have a lot
> of historical perspective - what does everyone think about the
> balance and flavour of the linuxchix lists?
The balance has become pretty good - we have a good group of mixed-
gender people, and while regulars tend to dominate discussion (like,
oooh, me!), I *think* that no one person or group dictates discussion
or limits the topics significantly.
I hope not, anyway. And I *hope* that the FAQs (the ones which exist,
the thought of writing a FAQ for techtalk just intimidates me!) provide
the ground-level answers which can springboard discussion, rather than
inhibiting it or seeming to be a 'final answer'.
The fact that issues has been so quiet since the FAQ was written worries
me. :(
> How about online
> female-centric or gender-equitable fora on the whole..?
I'm not on many female-centric fora, just this set.
Actually, I'm not on many online fora at all.
> [1] ...so I'm posting to another forum, to talk about posting
> too much. Oh, the Sad Irony. =)
Heh.
Just watch the number of posts over an average week or so. Except when
you're the person having a problem, you simply want to post less than a
third of the posts for the list. Even at a third, you're dominating
discussion - but there's others talking.
Also watch to see if something you say ends the discussion. As they say,
once is the thing itself. Twice is coincidence, three times is
conspiracy. Or, in this case, a sign that you're dominating discussion
in a baaaad way. :)
It's good to see people trying...
Jenn V.
--
"Do you ever wonder if there's a whole section of geek culture
you miss out on by being a geek?" - Dancer.
[EMAIL PROTECTED] Jenn Vesperman http://www.simegen.com/~jenn/
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