[EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
> Deirdre Saoirse wrote:
> >
> > I have this sort of dual problem: I never understood depressed people
> > until my husband died. And then I understood completely. But it's hard for
> > me to relate to that place now. But for a while I really did understand. I
> > took anti-depressants, which helped enormously. It was like a cloud
> > lifted.
>
> And the discussion swings back to the topic:
>
> I really REALLY hate anti-depressants, at least the ones they've tried on
> me.
>
> Either my ability to focus thoughts goes away, or I get a fog around my
> head and thinking has to push through it. And being /so/ geekish that
> my intelligence is one of my prime sources of self-esteem, anything which
> handicaps that is worse than the original depression.
>
> So anti-depressants depress me. Ain't that paradoxical?
>
> Any other geeks find that?
>
> Jenn V.
> --
> Humans are the only species to feed and house entirely separate species
> for no reason other than the pleasure of their company. Why?
>
> [EMAIL PROTECTED] Jenn Vesperman http://www.simegen.com/~jenn/
>
> ************
> [EMAIL PROTECTED] http://www.linuxchix.org
Caution: Blunt Talk Below....Maybe some "Guy Talk")
Well my main thing is panic attacks. Which are spooky, I was tried on xanax
(alpraxolam), clonazepam(Klonopin) and Panate (tranylcypromine). The latter
definitely did fix depression, but it HAS TO BE USED WITH CAUTION. One gets a
whole list of things one can't eat or drink. This drug works by inhibiting the
enzyme monoamine oxidase. This allows nuerotransmitters to not be destroyed.
This seems to effect mood. It certainly brighten my mood. My practioner in
California trusted me so he gave me this dangerous thing.
If you inhibit the enzyme monoamine oxidase, this also terms certain normal
foods into poisons. Like fish, fermented cheese, beer, fava beans, and a whole
list. Worst thing for geeks no pizza. For me no shrimp was a real pain!
The machanism for this is pretty simple, these foods have tyramine, which is a
pressor (blood pressure raising) chemical. This is a natural part of the food.
It now becomes dangerous.
My performance improved markedly under this. People thought I was finally out of
my slump and "going somewhere". It blocked panic and I did get more energetic.
Downsides for guy, was that usual guy bugaboo of "not being able to get it up."
Just a worry at that point. This is the drug that brought me close to the
"hypomanic state:" I did talk faster, get things done and all that. Funny people
were happier with me. Thought it was a great thing.
I eventually went back to the neo-traditional drugs for this. These are
Alprazolam (Xanax) and Clonazepam (Klonopin). The latter has a longer half-life
and is less bothersome. It stops almost all the panic attacks. This improves my
mood.
I found pure cognitive approaches fail for panic attacks, never even worked.
Many friends over the past decade have embraced either natutal medicine or sort
of supplements amy of which aren't really "inert" as various powers would have
one beleive. None of the cognitive approaches work for me. Counselors are the
few people who arouse an emotion close to contempt. I have never been impressed
by these people.
So the mixed approach, of drug treatment plus talking to close relatives and
fridns helps a lot, and fogs me little. This is clonazepam (6mg per day) or
(alprazolam 6mg per day). Note in some people this would cause "crash out..."
This is why professional help is useful. This dose titration is useful.
Note, the panic attacks are easily controlled. My depressive events seem
reactive. Like after bumping into the pugnaciousness of the local subculture
here in Northern West Virginia. or its general anti-intellectual stances. Or the
widespread belief that "women are talking over men's jobs" and all world
problems are "caused by people not accepting their god given role". If I were
female it would be worse cause it as lot more directed at women, Part of it is
being the only geek, or one of a very few in a land of geeks.
So I don't know if one can anti-depressant away such subcultural conflicts. Or
being in a place where at besst geekdom is looked at as a curiousity, a flash in
the pan, and then the world is going back to heavy industry. Where there is lot
of obnoxious football coach get the guys ready for the factory and women ready
to be housewife baby-machines. This is literally stated by many as a desiderata.
Note all the trcyclic antidepressants, Elavil, Norpramin etc andother such cause
fogging and clouding, or can cause clouding. They are not controlled
substrances, but in a way for me they have been worse than controlled
substances, such as valium(diazepam), xanax(alprazolam). Xanax certianly broke
my depression out west, but long walks and chat's with friends helped, and I
tapered off with no problems. Hence a friendly M.D. or D.O. you know helps a
lot.
I feel this relates to "linux" in that linux geeks, like lots of geeks work long
hours on sometimes difficult problems. And here in WV it is without a lot of
social support. Also if you are a guy or many times even a grrrl in a technical
field there are lots of things, and stresses one is assumed to just put up with.
I feel a kinder gentler enviornment would be helpful. Not more toughness. This
alas gets treated as "sissyness". But I think it is the way to go, not that the
problems will be less difficult. It is just easier to deal with problems in an
open and supportive environment. This idea that jobs have always be mean,
miserable, and depressing is just silly and stupid in my mind. Aand there is
nothing wrong with hoping for fulfillment and smooth smailing, acknoweledging
you will hit storm and know how to deal with them. That seems balanced to me.
And the nasty atmposphere is what has bothered me most about techie/nerd
environments. That is just my feelins and observations.
Note much useful pharmacological info at: http://www.cmhc.com/pro22.htm
looks well done and peer reviewed with straightforward answers.
If anyone one wants more info please emil me. I think geeks and depression is a
good "issue" issue. The detailed discussion of pharamacology is a bit beyond
Hence I have supressed my "Paxil Disaster Story..."
Have Fun,
Sends Steve
************
[EMAIL PROTECTED] http://www.linuxchix.org
