On Tue, 26 Oct 1999 [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
> Simon Britnell wrote:
> > 2) Talk to ambulance people about failed suicides. The percentage of
> > suicide attempts that make a mistake and end up maiming themselves
> > instead is suprising. I don't fear death. Disability is another
> > matter.
>
> One of the things that keeps me alive is the fear of disabling myself
> and making my situation worse. It can really work.
Actually, as someone who believes in reincarnation, the thought of being
immobile in diapers works for me. :)
> Completely agreed. I taught myself to stop seeing my family's adoration
> of my niece as an indictment on my not providing one, and I enjoy
> Ashleigh a lot more now. But I /still/ have trouble with people saying
> 'you're married? When are you having kids?'
Even if you're NOT married it happens. I went to Crate and Barrel to buy
patio furniture and it happened.
> I'm trying counselling. I don't like it so far - it tends to leave me
> worse than I was. I suspect that if I hadn't healed myself a lot
> before I tried it, I'd be a danger to myself. (So far I've never been
> a danger to others. Something I'm proud of. Car keys stay firmly in the
> handbag, not in the hand, when I'm depressed.)
I have this sort of dual problem: I never understood depressed people
until my husband died. And then I understood completely. But it's hard for
me to relate to that place now. But for a while I really did understand. I
took anti-depressants, which helped enormously. It was like a cloud
lifted.
--
_Deirdre * http://www.linuxcabal.net * http://www.deirdre.net
"Mars has been a tough target" -- Peter G. Neumann, Risks Digest Moderator
"That's because the Martians keep shooting things down." -- Harlan Rosenthal
<[EMAIL PROTECTED]>, retorting in Risks Digest 20.60
************
[EMAIL PROTECTED] http://www.linuxchix.org
