On the Lighter Side...

Answered Prayer

During the minister's prayer one Sunday, there was a loud whistle 
from one of the back pews. Tommy's mother was horrified. She pinched 
him into silence and, after church, asked, 'Tommy, whatever made you 
do such a thing?' Tommy answered soberly, 'I asked God to teach me to 
whistle, and He did!'

Dual Purpose

I met someone getting on the elevator who was drinking coffee and 
complaining about how coffee made him nervous. I said why don't you 
quit drinking coffee. He said, "Because if I didn't have the shakes I 
wouldn't get any exercise at all."

Riddle
Question: Why are bats who hang upside down afraid of old age?
Answer: "Incontinence"

A Horse Tale

A preacher trained his horse to go when he said, "Praise the Lord," 
and to stop when he said, "Amen." The preacher mounted the horse, 
said, "Praise the Lord" and went for a ride. When he wanted to stop 
for lunch, he said, "Amen." He took off again, saying, "Praise the 
Lord." The horse started going toward the edge of a cliff. The 
preacher got excited and said, "Whoa!" Then he remembered and said, 
"Amen," and the horse stopped at the edge of the cliff. The preacher 
was so relieved and grateful that he looked up to heaven and said, 
"Praise the Lord!"

Actual Classified Ad

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