Greetings everybody, I'm extremely upset to discover this thread.
I was about to send a very, very long e-mail. Then I realized it was an excellent candidate for being perceived as lecturing all the participants. So instead, I encourage everyone to read https://snarky.ca/why-i-took-october-off-from-oss-volunteering/.
Overall, discussing about LilyPond should remain a pleasure for all the people involved.
Sincerely, Jean