Wow, I'm amazed at the parallel experiences you and Dan have described,
Helaine. It's both encouraging and disheartening - encouraging to know that
it's possible to overcome roadblocks, disheartening to think that those
blocks stood in our way at all.
The big turning point for me was my senior year of college when I went crazy
and decided to take Calculus I - after not having taken math in any form for
four years, and during a time when I was also working on my history thesis.
I too thought about changing my major to science or CS a million times, but
never did. I took Calc because I missed using my brain in that way, it was
completely unrequired, and it was something I could do entirely for myself.
I was scared when I failed the pre-test, but I knew it wasn't because I
couldn't do math, I was just rusty. So I stuck with it. I had one of the
most amazing teachers ever, Prof. Kardos, a Hungarian woman who had studied
with some of the great mathmeticians of Hungary (who had worked with Paul
Erdos). It was wonderful to see a woman get so excited about a subject
which is so often considered the province of men. I proved a lot to myself
at that point, and it was shortly thereafter that I bought my own computer.
Helaine's description of how intimidating it was to do science during
adolescent/teen years also resonates with me. By 8th grade I had figured
out that guys didn't think it was so cool when I turned out to be smarter
than them in certain things. I figured I would never get a date if I
continued to let my brilliance ;) shine through, so I "dumbed" myself down.
I started letting go of this a lot in college, of course, and by the time I
graduated I just said "Fsck it - I'm going to be happy on my own terms".
I think if I had some female teachers like my Calc prof. earlier on, I would
have been much more inclined to make that decision earlier. But again,
that's the $1,000,000 question isn't.
~~~Nicoya...
P.s. Helaine - I'd love to know where you found an MS program that takes
your lib arts background into account.
|-----Original Message-----
|From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]]On
|Behalf Of Helaine McFerron
|Sent: Thursday, February 17, 2000 2:55 PM
|To: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
|Subject: RE: [issues] YAFGA (Yet Another Female Geeks Article)
|
|
|I would like to second what Nicoya said.
|
|Many times I have wanted to start down the path of a career in
|science but I
|always felt behind so I assumed I would never be successful. I
|don't know at
|what point I started feeling behind but most likely it was Jr.
|High. I just
|stopped doing anything math or science related about that time for some
|reason. Why I stopped is the million dollar answer to why girls don't go
|into science careers, I guess. Then by high school I thought I was
|over the
|hill. How absurd is that!!!!
|
|Anyway- I went on and got a BA even though I considered changing my major
|several times to something in the sciences. The inertia was overwhelming
|each time I tried. Everyone was pretty discouraging. I can't tell you how
|many times I've heard "- you don't have the math-yatta yatta yatta." At a
|certain point I even thought it would be too hard to be a woman in one of
|those majors. I liked my liberal arts buddies and classes.
|
|The change came when I entered the work force and despite my liberal arts
|degree and lack of any formal computer training my best job
|opportunity was
|a computer job. Now I'm in the computer field and happier then I've ever
|been intellectually. I've started a masters program in Computer
|science that
|takes it into account that I have a liberal arts background. It's
|kicking my
|ass but I want to overcome this.
|
|I do think that a lot of people think they're over the hill at 17
|like I did
|and that is INSANE! Just like it's insane to think you are over
|the hill at
|any age because it's not really about being the best person in your field
|because you started programming at age 3, it's about enjoying programming,
|right? We know this but somehow it doesn't sink into our minds. Even as I
|write this I have to admit to feeling behind and trapped in a lower
|paying/respected computer job due to lack of training and experience.
|
|I saw a TV interview with a 90+ year old woman who did nothing but talk
|about her life sailing. She had sailed here and there and every answer she
|gave about her life went back to sailing. When the interviewer asked her
|when she started sailing I was shocked to hear her answer. This woman did
|not start sailing until she was 60 years old. I thought she had sailed her
|whole life since she never mentioned anything else.
|
|Helaine
|
|
|From: "Nicoya Helm" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
|Reply-To: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
|To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
|Subject: RE: [issues] YAFGA (Yet Another Female Geeks Article)
|Date: Wed, 16 Feb 2000 13:25:19 -0000
|
|There was one passage in this article that really resonated with
|my personal
|experience:
|
|So by the time you get to high school, you've gone
|through the last 10 years not getting as
|much exposure
|as boys. Even if you haven't lost interest, you feel
|like you are behind. Now would you choose that field,
|if you really wanted to succeed?
|
|Okay, this is not deeply philosophical, just notes from my life...
|
|The above statement sums up my personal experience perfectly. I'm no where
|near a hacker. I've just recently got my first linux box up and running.
|The last thing I really coded was some BASIC drivel in high school. Yet
|I've always been drawn to computers and technology, and somehow I always
|managed to pick up stuff on the side of whatever else it was I was "really"
|doing with my life. Still, the statement above applies to me
|because I found
|it hard to get the level of exposure to computers that I desired. My
|parents refused to buy me one, so of course I had to rely on exposure in
|school. I did get a lot of wonderful exposure at school, but thinking that
|I would never get to take what I was learning and apply it outside
|of school
|lead to a certain amount of apathy on my part - like "oh, well, I'll never
|get my own computer, why bother learning this stuff (even if I do
|really dig
|it). I also resented the fact that most of the boys I knew had computers -
|their parents thought it was a great "toy" for them. To make a long story
|short, by the time I graduated college I realized that "it's never too late
|to become what you've always wanted to be (George Elliot)", so I bought my
|very first computer as a graduation gift to myself. Still, I've spent the
|last couple of years feeling very behind, like I'm making up for a lot of
|lost time. It wasn't till I had the maturity and determination to do it on
|my own that I really was able to pursue computers, but I think if I'd had
|more support along the way, esp. from people close to me like teachers and
|family, then I might have graduated with a BS instead of a BA.
|
|~~~Nicoya...
|
|
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