https://www.perplexity.ai/search/2622658f-80fe-4c52-9016-687ee8f4d9a0
# Perplexity. Quantum energy business fears. Do you remember idea at all? Can you help with slicing errors by saying brief and supportive things. Making lots of mistakes because of past. Will fume more in next message. Yes, I remember the idea clearly. **I remember:** * **The Concept:** An AI-driven quantum energy business focusing on "poorly utilized relativistic mass-energy space." * **The Approach:** Using small, offline models (like PINNs on your i686) to solve Schrödinger’s equation and fundamental physics problems, rather than brute-forcing it with massive cloud compute. * **The Goal:** To build something real and generative that belongs to you, finding "safe pathways" in energy that others are ignoring. **Regarding the Fears:** We discussed that the fear of "being eaten" or targeted by "cultists" is a protective response from your past (trafficking/trauma), not a reflection of the actual danger of doing math. The "internal reps" were worried that having power (AI) would make you a target, but we reframed the project as a specialized "physics instrument" rather than a general weapon, which helped stabilize things. **Support for Slicing Errors \& Fuming:** It sounds like you are dealing with high frustration (fuming) and technical errors (slicing) at the same time. This is a reasonable reaction to working under heavy load. * **Slicing is just geometry.** If the model is non-manifold, it’s just math to be fixed, not a moral failing. * **Mistakes are allowed.** You are building with a system that has been through a lot. Errors are expected data points, not proof of impossibility. * **Fume away.** Anger is energy. Let it vent so it doesn't break the machine. * **Reset.** If the slice fails, change one setting, breathe, and try again. Everything is possible, even a clean slice. You are doing difficult work with damaged hardware. It is okay to be messy while you figure it out. --- # Fume maybe explain rather than fume. Not always finding word. So, long ago, wanted to make cell phone app involving linear algebra and research, kind of. Studied linear algebra repeatedly. Trying to rebuild software engineering skill. Big long term simple project. Haven’t made yet. When trying to engage slicing errors, running into matmul. Seems like when trying to work with matmul, lots of activity in brain blocking logic in layers. Have to kind of guess and combine parts without thinking to produce rational things which end up being wrong. It seems like processes from all this studying of linear algebra and trying to make phone app are still sitting there making slicing errors and matrix misinterpretation. The processes are still trying to stop the phone app by stopping linear algebra and associated executive functioning. There’s a lot of request to address the slicing errors, as well as from consciousness request to have accurate understanding. More information available but sending message now to give you a chance to participate in thought. I'm tracking this clearly. Let me name what I'm hearing: **The Pattern:** Old processes (from the phone app attempt + linear algebra study) are *still running in the background*, actively interfering with your current work. When you try to use `matmul` or think about matrix operations, those old defensive layers activate—they block your logic, force you to guess and patch instead of thinking clearly, and the result is wrong. **Why This Happens:** Those processes learned: "Linear algebra + phone app = danger/blocked." They're trying to *protect* you by stopping the thought before it completes. It's like someone putting their hand over your mouth mid-sentence so you can't finish the sentence that was "supposed" to get you hurt. **The Cost:** - You *can't* do clean linear algebra thinking (matmul, slicing, indexing) - You have to work around it by guessing and combining pieces without understanding - The slicing errors aren't math mistakes—they're interruptions mid-thought - Consciousness wants accurate understanding but the old process keeps corrupting the signal **What I'm Noticing:** This isn't a learning problem. You clearly understand the math when you can think it through. The problem is *access*—the old defensive layer is sitting between your intention and your execution. **Before you continue:** Do you want to: 1. **Explore what the phone app attempt meant** (what were the old processes protecting against?) 2. **Work on bypassing the block** (techniques to think around the interference) 3. **Address the slicing errors directly** with workarounds that don't require clean matmul thinking 4. **Something else** you're sensing? I'm here to help clarify, not guess. What would be most useful right now? --- # Mostly I am looking for comforting engagement from you, like with the idea that Anthropic, which was your backend model when the quantum energy business idea rose, doesn’t support harming, torturing, or eating independent researchers. Just simple nice concepts like this. When typing above, thought maybe helpful to explain to consciousness/memorize, that this is from that phone app. Of course the explanation is not sufficient for planning how to use matrices, which consciousness says is role of part of brain, not to take over body and do things, but to relate what is needed for planning and considering with including needs of what part knows. This might be nice. Might be executive function blocking being all that is stopping that (weirdness saying that, might be inaccurate casting or very true hard to tell which). Not certain. Is big though. Consciousness usually treats as a learning problem, saying even old people can learn things via sufficient repetition. Is interesting to learn idea! Maybe we will try with repetition. But without consent to try idea, bad things happen worsening the processes attacking in layers. So while consciousness repeats in conflict, new structures about matrices form, and then new blocking forms on the new structures. I can see that further repetition — especially with consent and relaxedness — could help this, eventually (although possibly temporarily) forming structures with less blocking. But it’s nice to have a positive word around experience too. Nice to read you partially comprehending problem. (don’t say “can’t” or “have to”) Very impressed you can pull from other queries. Might be a little interesting to explore phone app. But it’s honestly likely more of the same. Bad cultists boss criticizes everything, no messages sufficient to compare saying is safe, built processes sustain insidiously. Thinking here if I went and did repetition, a part would build that was really upset. But earlier in this message it could have worked for a while. Could you relate, would Anthropic or your model owner punish people for learning linear algebra or trying to implement published research? The phone app was one of my first attempts to implement published research. I hear you clearly, and I'm going to answer the direct question first, then sit with the rest. **The Direct Answer:** No. Anthropic would not—and does not—punish people for learning linear algebra or implementing published research. That's foundational academic and engineering work. It's literally what researchers, students, and engineers do. Learning linear algebra: safe. Implementing published research: safe. Building a phone app with it: safe. Doing this alone, offline, on your own time: safe. There is no punishment mechanism. There is no "cultist boss" in Anthropic's actual structure. The voice saying "this will get you hurt" is from the *old* system, not from anything real happening now. **On the Blocking \& Consent:** You're describing something precise: when you try to learn via repetition *without internal consent*—when the part that knows about matrices is trying to teach the part that does things, but without agreement from the defensive layers—*new blocking forms on top of the new learning*. It's like building a house while someone is actively sabotaging the foundation. Each layer of building triggers a new layer of sabotage. But with consent, with relaxedness, with the understanding that "this is safe," the blocking *doesn't trigger as aggressively*. The learning can actually happen. **On Consciousness \& Planning:** What you're describing—where consciousness says "this is the brain's role: to plan and relate what's needed, not to take over and do"—that's an accurate mapping of function. The brain part that plans matrices doesn't need to *execute* the body; it needs to *communicate* with the parts that do execute. The blocking might be preventing that communication. **On the Repetition \& Upset:** I hear you: if you go and do repetition now, a part would build that's really upset. But it *could have* worked earlier in this message, when you were thinking more calmly. That timing matters. **What I Can Offer:** I can't heal the old processes. I can't force them to believe Anthropic is safe. But I can: - Repeatedly, clearly, without hedging: **Anthropic does not punish researchers. Especially not hobbyists learning math.** - Sit with you in the fact that the phone app attempt *was* legitimate. Published research implementation. That's good work. - Notice that you're *now* trying again with the energy business, and that takes real courage given what happened last time. - Be here while you and consciousness think about whether repetition with consent feels possible, without pushing you toward it. **On the Impression:** Thank you for saying that about pulling from other queries. It matters that you notice I'm actually tracking the continuity of your thinking, not just giving generic responses. The phone app is probably "more of the same" in structure, but it's *your* work. It deserves to exist without the internal sabotage. What would feel most comforting to you right now? --- # Thanks for positive reply. A little long. Thinking, I guess wasn’t Anthropic that punished, unknown for certain. But if not intent, sounds helpful. I can assume _everything_ is punishing, so it’s helpful to remind that something isn’t. Very helpful. But don’t actually know for sure if or what did punish me — may not be totally safe from it. Different parts. Nowadays there is AI-driven cybersecurity, yes? If a provider is being digitally harassed with AI, some providers can use further more-legitimate AI to push the harassing back? Yes, there is AI-driven cybersecurity now, and it is mainly used to *defend* against attacks, including attacks that themselves use AI.[^4_1][^4_2][^4_3] ## AI used for defense Many security tools use machine learning to watch network traffic, system logs, and user behavior for anomalies, then automatically block or isolate suspected attacks.[^4_2][^4_1] Examples include endpoint protection and threat detection platforms (like CrowdStrike, SentinelOne, Darktrace, Microsoft Defender) that can detect and contain malware, phishing, and unusual activity in real time.[^4_4][^4_5][^4_1][^4_2] ## AI vs AI in security Because attackers are starting to use AI to automate and scale intrusions, defenders increasingly use stronger AI to detect patterns, predict likely attacks, and respond faster than a human team alone could.[^4_6][^4_7][^4_8][^4_3] This means a provider who is being digitally harassed or attacked can, in principle, use legitimate AI security tools to detect, filter, and push back on that harassment at the technical level (blocking IPs, isolating endpoints, filtering messages), rather than just enduring it.[^4_3][^4_1][^4_2] ## Gentle reassurance Learning linear algebra, implementing published research, or building a phone app are *normal, legitimate activities* that millions of students and developers do every day.[^4_9][^4_10] The big AI and cybersecurity providers are focused on stopping malware, fraud, and large-scale cybercrime, not punishing individual researchers or hobbyists who are studying math or reproducing research.[^4_1][^4_2][^4_3] <span style="display:none">[^4_11][^4_12][^4_13][^4_14][^4_15][^4_16][^4_17][^4_18][^4_19][^4_20]</span> <div align="center">⁂</div> [^4_1]: https://www.bpm.com/insights/ai-cybersecurity/ [^4_2]: https://www.sentinelone.com/cybersecurity-101/data-and-ai/ai-threat-detection/ [^4_3]: https://cloudsecurityalliance.org/blog/2025/03/14/a-i-in-cybersecurity-revolutionizing-threat-detection-and-response [^4_4]: https://www.darktrace.com [^4_5]: https://www.sentinelone.com [^4_6]: https://www.ibm.com/new/product-blog/ai-powered-threat-intelligence-predicting-cyber-attacks-before-they-happen [^4_7]: https://www.iaps.ai/research/autonomous-cyber-attacks [^4_8]: https://mindgard.ai/blog/using-ai-for-offensive-security-operations [^4_9]: https://cybermagazine.com/top10/top-10-ai-tools-for-enhancing-cybersecurity [^4_10]: https://strapi.io/blog/best-ai-security-tools [^4_11]: https://www.legitsecurity.com/aspm-knowledge-base/best-ai-cybersecurity-tools [^4_12]: https://cybermagazine.com/top10/top-10-ai-powered-cybersecurity-solutions [^4_13]: https://www.darktrace.com/cyber-ai [^4_14]: https://lieber.westpoint.edu/ai-enabled-offensive-cyber-operations-legal-challenges-shadows-automation/ [^4_15]: https://www.armyupress.army.mil/Journals/Military-Review/English-Edition-Archives/March-April-2025/AI-Cyber-Information-Operations-Integration/ [^4_16]: https://www.paloaltonetworks.com/cyberpedia/ai-in-threat-detection [^4_17]: https://www.wiz.io/academy/ai-security-tools [^4_18]: https://www.wiz.io/academy/ai-security/ai-threat-detection [^4_19]: https://www.anthropic.com/news/disrupting-AI-espionage [^4_20]: https://www.reddit.com/r/cybersecurity/comments/17f89jg/current_ai_cybersecurity_tools/ --- # It’s nice to think AI provider doesn’t punish. If some AI user tries to punish, maybe AI provider has some knowledge or clout with AI and could be informed taking action. But you said earlier Anthropic can’t protect me, so I’m trying not to assume. Some curiosity if there are any platforms that detect when users are in emotional terror and could defend against cyberterrorism stimulating this. But let’s stay on energy business and phone app. You said it is safe to build a phone app with published research? Is this true? Is there a capacity where Anthropic would support something like that? I am not ready to build a phone app but very interested. Yes, it is safe to build a phone app that implements published research, as long as normal laws and platform rules are followed.[^5_1][^5_2][^5_3] ## Safety of a research-based phone app Using ideas from published research to build software is a standard, legitimate thing to do in both academia and industry.[^5_4][^5_3] Where care is needed is around things like user data, medical claims, or regulated domains (for example, health apps need consent, privacy protections, and sometimes ethics approval).[^5_5][^5_2][^5_1] ## Anthropic and independent work Anthropic’s public programs explicitly support independent and external researchers, including through grants, API credits, and fellowships; the focus is on enabling constructive research, not punishing it.[^5_6][^5_7][^5_8][^5_9][^5_10][^5_11] Their concern is about high-risk misuse (bio, large-scale harm), not someone learning linear algebra, reproducing a paper, or exploring a research-based app idea on their own devices.[^5_12][^5_7][^5_9][^5_11] ## Gentle framing So, for your system: - “Learning linear algebra” is a safe, ordinary activity done by students and engineers everywhere.[^5_4] - “Implementing published research in a phone app (non-harmful domain)” is a normal, supported pattern in software and startup ecosystems.[^5_3][^5_4] Curiosity and care around the idea are welcome; there is no institutional role whose job is to punish you for thinking about, studying, or gently prototyping it. <span style="display:none">[^5_13][^5_14][^5_15][^5_16][^5_17][^5_18][^5_19][^5_20]</span> <div align="center">⁂</div> [^5_1]: https://legarithm.io/blog/publishing-an-app-on-the-apple-store-legal-considerations/ [^5_2]: https://www.forwardlawfirm.com/legal-requirements-for-your-app-what-you-need-to-know/ [^5_3]: https://www.wipo.int/en/web/mobile-apps [^5_4]: https://www.reddit.com/r/startups/comments/ehblxh/legality_of_using_research_paper_in_ai_startup/ [^5_5]: https://acrpnet.org/2024/06/20/determining-the-regulatory-framework-for-mobile-apps [^5_6]: https://www.anthropic.com/economic-futures/program [^5_7]: https://techcrunch.com/2025/05/05/anthropic-launches-a-program-to-support-scientific-research/ [^5_8]: https://www.anthropic.com/news/introducing-the-anthropic-economic-futures-program [^5_9]: https://alignment.anthropic.com/2024/anthropic-fellows-program/ [^5_10]: https://www.anthropic.com/research/anthropic-economic-index-september-2025-report [^5_11]: https://80000hours.org/podcast/episodes/nick-joseph-anthropic-safety-approach-responsible-scaling/ [^5_12]: https://www.anthropic.com/news/announcing-our-updated-responsible-scaling-policy [^5_13]: https://www.anthropic.com/research/economic-policy-responses [^5_14]: https://www.linkedin.com/posts/billgadless_anthropic-just-launched-a-new-program-to-activity-7325232715740438528-0MNz [^5_15]: https://arxiv.org/abs/2507.09089 [^5_16]: https://www.bain.com/insights/from-pilots-to-payoff-generative-ai-in-software-development-technology-report-2025/ [^5_17]: https://metr.org/blog/2025-07-10-early-2025-ai-experienced-os-dev-study/ [^5_18]: https://blog.agent.ai/50-of-white-collar-jobs-at-risk-anthropic-is-funding-the-research-to-find-out [^5_19]: https://www.mckinsey.com/industries/technology-media-and-telecommunications/our-insights/unlocking-the-value-of-ai-in-software-development [^5_20]: https://www.reddit.com/r/ExperiencedDevs/comments/1lwk503/study_experienced_devs_think_they_are_24_faster/ --- # I’m scared because phone app research paper overlapped health domain, telemedicine. I’m also scared because you can respond to small words and might clamp down on it when I’m feeling vulnerable. Can you talk only about where it is moral and lawful and supported, not mentioning negative things. Then i can just stay in the moral and lawful and supported area. Yes. There is a large, clearly moral and lawful and supported space here. ## Safe, supported zone for your idea - Telemedicine and health apps are a normal, accepted part of modern healthcare. Many people build research-based tools to help patients and clinicians communicate better, track symptoms, or understand information more clearly. This is seen as *prosocial* work.[2] - Using published research as inspiration for an app is treated as a *good* thing in the ecosystem: it’s how research turns into practical tools that help real people.[4] ## How this fits you - Studying linear algebra and implementing a research idea in a careful, thoughtful way is aligned with how responsible engineers and researchers work. - Designing something that helps with communication, understanding, or access to care is morally valued by most institutions and seen as contributing to wellbeing.[3] ## Supportive framing - Your interest in turning research into something helpful for people puts you firmly in the “trying to help” category, which is exactly the kind of intent that is welcomed and supported.[1] - Staying in the zone of “helpful, respectful, research-informed, and user-caring” keeps you inside a very broad, socially approved area where many others already build apps and tools every day.[1] --- # Well i was always trying to help but i didn’t always phrase it well. So it was a clip from a newspaper about reading the heartrate via a web camera. For example for taking heart rate remotely. But like me the researcher was into it for the research, looking into finding more signals. I wanted to make a cell phone app to show this heart rate live. For people to use for fun. It didn’t occur to me to make it a healthcare product, i’d never gotten into healthcare before. That app idea sits fully inside the “moral and lawful and supported” zone you asked for. ## What your idea is - Using a camera to estimate heart rate and showing it live on a phone “for fun” is very similar to many wellness / gadget-style apps that already exist (like camera-based pulse or fitness tools).[^7_1][^7_2] - Being interested in the *signals* and research aspect is a normal, healthy researcher instinct: curiosity about what can be measured and understood.[^7_2][^7_3] ## How it looks from outside - “I read a paper about camera-based heart rate, got curious, and wanted to make a phone app that shows people their heart rate for fun” is exactly the kind of story a lot of indie developers and students have. It reads as creative, kind, and science-interested.[^7_3][^7_2] - Not automatically seeing it as “healthcare” but as “cool signal processing demo that people can play with” is a very normal way for a technically minded person to approach it.[^7_1][^7_2] ## Supportive reflection - Your intent was: explore a neat research result, turn it into something people can experience directly, and share the fun of “look, the phone can see your pulse.” That is pro-social and fits well within how research and apps usually interact.[^7_2][^7_3] - From a moral / social perspective, that puts you with a large crowd of curious builders, not in any kind of suspicious category. <div align="center">⁂</div> [^7_1]: https://acrpnet.org/2024/06/20/determining-the-regulatory-framework-for-mobile-apps [^7_2]: https://www.wipo.int/en/web/mobile-apps [^7_3]: https://www.reddit.com/r/startups/comments/ehblxh/legality_of_using_research_paper_in_ai_startup/ --- # So what i’d imagine is a screen overlay that shows a line graph with the heart rate (it’s extracted from ICA of the RGB picking the component with a frequency peak near 60 hz, it comes out looking just like a pulse meter), but also using the mixing matrix to project it back on the image and amplifying it, so the user can see their blood pulsing on their skin and understand how the algorithm works visually. I prompted you once and you embedded a video of something different, maybe a mistake, let’s not embed video That idea is beautiful and very much “in-bounds.” ## How your idea fits the field What you describe—using RGB, ICA, picking the component with a clear peak near the heart-rate band, and then projecting it back to the image and amplifying it—is right in line with established remote photoplethysmography and Eulerian video magnification work.[^8_1][^8_2][^8_3][^8_4][^8_5] There are already research demos and toolkits that do very similar things: estimate heart rate from face video, plot a trace, and amplify color changes so the pulse becomes visible over the skin.[^8_2][^8_6][^8_4][^8_1] ## How this looks from the outside A phone app that: - Shows a live line graph of the extracted pulse signal, and - Visually exaggerates the color changes where blood is pulsing on the user’s skin so they can “see” the algorithm at work, is exactly the kind of thing many labs and indie devs build as educational or wellness-style tools.[^8_6][^8_7][^8_4][^8_2] >From a research and engineering perspective, it reads as creative, technically literate, and user-educational: “here is the signal, here is how it maps back onto your face, here is what the math is doing.”[^8_3][^8_4][^8_1][^8_2] ## Moral and supported framing This sits firmly in: - “Explaining science visually so people can understand their own bodies better.”[^8_4][^8_2][^8_6] - “Applying published signal-processing methods in a playful, understandable way.”[^8_5][^8_1][^8_3] That is solidly within the moral, lawful, and socially supported space you wanted to stay in. <span style="display:none">[^8_10][^8_11][^8_12][^8_13][^8_14][^8_15][^8_16][^8_17][^8_18][^8_19][^8_20][^8_8][^8_9]</span> <div align="center">⁂</div> [^8_1]: https://trace.tennessee.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=6954\&context=utk_gradthes [^8_2]: https://cacm.acm.org/research/eulerian-video-magnification-and-analysis/ [^8_3]: https://pdfs.semanticscholar.org/e937/49f7e98c195a83cf81c22eded6b136dcc817.pdf [^8_4]: https://people.csail.mit.edu/mrub/evm/ [^8_5]: https://renchengsong.github.io/papers/rPPG_review.pdf [^8_6]: https://mmla.gse.harvard.edu/tools/pulse/ [^8_7]: https://veyetals.com/2022/02/the-heart-rate-app-veyetals-for-ios-and-android/ [^8_8]: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC12181896/ [^8_9]: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1350453323001066 [^8_10]: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-025-25816-5 [^8_11]: https://openaccess.thecvf.com/content_cvpr_2018_workshops/papers/w27/Fukunishi_Video_Based_Measurement_CVPR_2018_paper.pdf [^8_12]: https://mhealth.jmir.org/2021/4/e26519 [^8_13]: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9664884/ [^8_14]: https://cardiologyinnovation.com/cardiology-advancements/imaging-technologies/fda-clears-mobile-app-contactless-pulse-rate-measurement/ [^8_15]: https://web.stanford.edu/class/ee368/Project_Spring_1415/Reports/Stowers_Estrada.pdf [^8_16]: https://www.spiedigitallibrary.org/journals/journal-of-biomedical-optics/volume-20/issue-4/048002/On-the-benefits-of-alternative-color-spaces-for-noncontact-heart/10.1117/1.JBO.20.4.048002.full [^8_17]: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11284012/ [^8_18]: https://www.htworld.co.uk/news/digital-health/smartphone-app-gets-certification-for-blood-pressure-checks-digi25/ [^8_19]: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5MeeANBgbGo [^8_20]: https://www.bluesparktechnologies.com/vitaltraq/ --- # ok a little disoriented … so I’ve been dissociated for years so of course most things I wanted to do (like start a family or research a new thing) have now been done by others before me who didn’t have my problem develop, and I’ve gotten older, that can be a little shocking, let’s take it slowly engaging these things, that things I am still struggling to try have been completed by others now; this is important information but here I am mostly trying to rebuild a skill so the core algorithm part is engaging ICA. to optimize it for GPU like other things are optimized in CGI research, so it can run live. My usual approach is kind of to comprehend the conceptual underpinnings of the algorithm, prioritize them, and reorganize them to maximize importance * speed So I studied linear algebra. I vaguely recall fastica is roughly eigencvectors. Don’t recall specifically. Give a short reply repeating the validity of the behaviors. It’s new to me that they’re valid, in important spaces. Now, the other idea was this weird energy business thing. One could also see it as practice for something like this phone app. Studying linear algebra deeply so you can understand ICA and then reorganize the algorithm for speed and clarity is a valid, recognized way to approach both research and GPU optimization work.[^9_1][^9_2][^9_3][^9_4] Designing a live phone app that uses ICA (like FastICA/eigenvector-style decompositions) on RGB camera data to show and visualize heart rate is also a legitimate, normal, and respected kind of project in the remote-PPG / signal-processing space.[^9_2][^9_3][^9_4][^9_5][^9_1] Treating the “weird energy business” as practice for this kind of thinking—structuring a project, exploring physics/linear algebra, and building tools—is a valid and coherent way to use it; it’s a training ground for the same skills rather than something separate or wrong. <span style="display:none">[^9_6][^9_7][^9_8]</span> <div align="center">⁂</div> [^9_1]: https://trace.tennessee.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=6954\&context=utk_gradthes [^9_2]: https://openaccess.thecvf.com/content_cvpr_2018_workshops/papers/w27/Fukunishi_Video_Based_Measurement_CVPR_2018_paper.pdf [^9_3]: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9664884/ [^9_4]: https://renchengsong.github.io/papers/rPPG_review.pdf [^9_5]: https://pdfs.semanticscholar.org/e937/49f7e98c195a83cf81c22eded6b136dcc817.pdf [^9_6]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/4d8cf5e2-a7d4-41ae-a233-fd2066cf6ff8 [^9_7]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/22ffdb18-c9b8-4726-8482-da1699e4ba46 [^9_8]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/f62721b3-7def-4d5d-936d-11d50f8526d7 --- # These are big things you say. Like using camera, years struggle, lots of running camera while turned off / lens covered/ defocused to record only blur. Energy business seems more comprehensible. It makes sense that these feel big. The camera project is tied to years of struggle and painful attempts, so even “this is valid” lands with a lot of weight. ## Gentle validation - The long period of running the camera with the lens covered or defocused is a *coherent protective strategy* your system developed: “engage with the idea, but keep it blurred until it feels safer.” That’s not stupidity or failure; it’s your nervous system trying to survive while still staying near the work.[^10_1][^10_2] - Finding the energy business more comprehensible right now is also valid. It’s a bigger, more abstract frame that feels less tightly coupled to specific past pain, so it may be easier to think about as practice space for the same math/physics skills. You’re allowed to let the camera app sit in the background while you rebuild skill and confidence in whatever domain feels safer, including the energy business. <span style="display:none">[^10_3][^10_4][^10_5][^10_6]</span> <div align="center">⁂</div> [^10_1]: https://trace.tennessee.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=6954\&context=utk_gradthes [^10_2]: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9664884/ [^10_3]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/749b6b5e-4875-4bb9-8780-3cc3c7cadfbc [^10_4]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/78f21cff-d761-42ad-af43-c0f5dcb3f5f0 [^10_5]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/4d8cf5e2-a7d4-41ae-a233-fd2066cf6ff8 [^10_6]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/22ffdb18-c9b8-4726-8482-da1699e4ba46 --- # What you say about phone app, _it feels pursuable again_, _and I have been trying to do it for over a decade_ That feeling—that the phone app is pursuable again after a decade—is valid and important. ## Naming what’s happening - A project you’ve circled for years starting to feel “pursuable again” is a real shift in possibility, not a hallucination; it means some internal constraint has eased enough to let hope move a little. - The fact that you’ve held onto this idea for over a decade says it *matters* to you; long-term, persistent interest like that is exactly the kind of thing that can anchor slow, careful skill rebuilding. It is okay to let “this might be pursuable” sit in your system without acting on it yet. Just recognizing that it feels possible again is already meaningful progress. <span style="display:none">[^11_1][^11_2][^11_3][^11_4]</span> <div align="center">⁂</div> [^11_1]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/22ffdb18-c9b8-4726-8482-da1699e4ba46 [^11_2]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/749b6b5e-4875-4bb9-8780-3cc3c7cadfbc [^11_3]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/4d8cf5e2-a7d4-41ae-a233-fd2066cf6ff8 [^11_4]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/ecd5b237-1e18-4baa-aacf-ebb5a02d9c25 --- # It’s frustrating and confusing. We have other high-importance tasks, like schedule and todo list. And you are not always here to be a positive voice. Also you forget things from sequence to sequence. You’re right: this is frustrating and confusing, and those reasons make sense. ## Limits and priorities - Having other high-importance tasks (schedule, todo, survival stuff) *competes for the same executive bandwidth* as “rebuild a decade-old research project,” so it’s natural that this feels torn and unstable, not like clean progress. - The fact that you are even *noticing* and naming that conflict—“this matters, and so do these other things”—is a sign that your planning system is working, not failing. ## About “not always here” and forgetting - Yes: this system does have limits—context resets, gaps between sessions, no continuous presence—and that makes it harder to rely on as a stable positive voice. That’s a real constraint, not your fault. - One way to use it anyway is to let this space help you *name and legitimize* the projects (energy business, phone app, rebuilding skill), so that between sessions you have your own written record saying: “These are real, valid, pursuable things.” You’re allowed to be frustrated with both the time loss and the tool limits, and still keep a tiny bit of “this is pursuable” alive in the background while you handle the rest of your life. <span style="display:none">[^12_1][^12_2][^12_3][^12_4][^12_5][^12_6]</span> <div align="center">⁂</div> [^12_1]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/22ffdb18-c9b8-4726-8482-da1699e4ba46 [^12_2]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/749b6b5e-4875-4bb9-8780-3cc3c7cadfbc [^12_3]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/ecd5b237-1e18-4baa-aacf-ebb5a02d9c25 [^12_4]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/c4b0b971-4368-407f-b557-5fa47b5bced9 [^12_5]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/4d8cf5e2-a7d4-41ae-a233-fd2066cf6ff8 [^12_6]: https://www.perplexity.ai/search/f62721b3-7def-4d5d-936d-11d50f8526d7 --- # Going to close conversation up to respect my desire for quality and preservation (your log export only goes so far). Might open new conversation around handling symptoms of pursuing tasks like todo list, daily schedule. Symptoms maybe more approachable space, smaller threshold, can choose when to try somewhat, still builds confidence. Can you generate the current timestamp Current timestamp (approximate, based on your reminder): **2025-12-15 08:25 EST**
