Wietse:
> What are the DNS records (MX, A) for your mail server?

jason hirsh:
> mail.kasdivi.com.       IN      A       209.160.65.133
> kasdivi.com.    IN      MX      5 mail.kasdivi.com.

Wietse:
> Now, look in your logs for 168.100.189.2. If nothing is there,
> then your logging is broken

jason hirsh:
> My Log shows
> 
> pr 16 15:33:07 tuna postfix/smtpd[37327]: permit_mynetworks:  
> spike.porcupine.org 168.100.189.2
[etcetera]

If you don't see Mindspring etc. activity in your logs, then

- Their servers are not connecting to your machine, for reasons
  that have yet to be determined (no glue records for kasdivi.com
  at the top-level DNS servers, sender does not like your generic
  reverse DNS record, ...).

- Their servers do connect, but their activity is lost in all your
  verbose logging.

I would start with turning off Postfix verbose logging, then monitor
the logfile for sessions that fail repeatedly with "lost connection",
"timeout" and other abnormalities.

        Wietse

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