Hi Paul, Thanks for the review.
Please see inline. You may also see the diff that integrates your comments and intdir review: Diff: draft-ietf-opsawg-tsvwg-udp-ipfix.txt - draft-ietf-opsawg-tsvwg-udp-ipfix.txt<https://author-tools.ietf.org/api/iddiff?url_1=https://boucadair.github.io/udp-ipfix/draft-ietf-opsawg-tsvwg-udp-ipfix.txt&url_2=https://boucadair.github.io/udp-ipfix/Joe-Review/draft-ietf-opsawg-tsvwg-udp-ipfix.txt>. Your review on these changes is more than welcome. Cheers, Med De : Aitken, Paul <pait...@ciena.com> Envoyé : mercredi 8 mai 2024 11:42 À : drafts-expert-review-comm...@iana.org; BOUCADAIR Mohamed INNOV/NET <mohamed.boucad...@orange.com> Cc : ie-doct...@ietf.org; opsawg <opsawg@ietf.org> Objet : Re: [Ie-doctors] [IANA #1363824] Expert review for draft-ietf-opsawg-tsvwg-udp-ipfix (ipfix) * 3. UDP Options at a Glance Add "to" : e.g., to discover a path MTU or share timestamps [Med] OK. * 4. New UDP IPFIX Information Elements The URLs in the "note" should be listed in the references. The note should say "to be updated / removed by the RFC editor". [Med] Makes sense. Done. * 4.2. and 4.3. / Description The information is encoded in a set of 16-bit fields. Each 16-bit field carries the observed ExID in an EXP option. I mis-parsed this as if each 16-bit field carries an EXP option: "Each 16-bit field carries the observed ExID / in an EXP option." It may be clearer as, "Each 16-bit field carries the ExID which was observed in an EXP option." [Med] ACK. * 4.2. and 4.3. No mention is made of whether ordering is important or unimportant. [Med] It is not important as we are silent about it. * 5. Examples Add "a": If a udpOptions IE is exported for this Flow, [Med] OK * Under Figure 2: Let us now consider a UDP Flow in which both SAFE and UNSAFE Experimental options are observed. Let us also consider that the observed SAFE Experimental options have ExIDs set to 0x9858 and 0xE2D4, and UNSAFE Experimental options have ExIDs set to 0xC3D9 and 0x9858. The last 0x9858 should be 0x9658 to correspond with the following point 2 and Figure 4. 0x9858 and 0x9658 are very similar. Could more distinct values be used? [Med] We are using the same value to exemplify that the same ExID may be present in both safe and unsafe shared options. * Figure 3: If udpOptions IE is exported for this Flow, then that IE will have bits in positions 127 (EXP) and 254 (UEXP) set to 1 (Figure 3<https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/html/draft-ietf-opsawg-tsvwg-udp-ipfix#ex-udp-shared>). The goal is to set bits 127 and 254, so it's confusing to see what appears to be bits 1 and 128 set: MSB LSB 12 25 0 1 2 3 ... 7 8 9 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 ... 8 9 0 1 2 3 4 5 +-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ |X|1|X|X| |X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|1|X|X| |X|X|X|X|X|X|X| +-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-++-++-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ Intuitively one would expect to see these bits: MSB LSB 12 25 0 1 2 3 ... 7 8 9 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 ... 8 9 0 1 2 3 4 5 +-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ |X|X|X|X| |X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|1|X|X|X| |X|X|X|X|X|1|X| +-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-++-++-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ However since bit 2^n is set for option n, the problem is really with the misleading bit numbering in the figure. ie, the example would be clearer without the numbering. [Med] Made some changes. Hope this is better. ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Ce message et ses pieces jointes peuvent contenir des informations confidentielles ou privilegiees et ne doivent donc pas etre diffuses, exploites ou copies sans autorisation. Si vous avez recu ce message par erreur, veuillez le signaler a l'expediteur et le detruire ainsi que les pieces jointes. Les messages electroniques etant susceptibles d'alteration, Orange decline toute responsabilite si ce message a ete altere, deforme ou falsifie. Merci. This message and its attachments may contain confidential or privileged information that may be protected by law; they should not be distributed, used or copied without authorisation. If you have received this email in error, please notify the sender and delete this message and its attachments. As emails may be altered, Orange is not liable for messages that have been modified, changed or falsified. Thank you.
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