Hi Paul,

Thanks for the review.

Please see inline.

You may also see the diff that integrates your comments and intdir review: 
Diff: draft-ietf-opsawg-tsvwg-udp-ipfix.txt - 
draft-ietf-opsawg-tsvwg-udp-ipfix.txt<https://author-tools.ietf.org/api/iddiff?url_1=https://boucadair.github.io/udp-ipfix/draft-ietf-opsawg-tsvwg-udp-ipfix.txt&url_2=https://boucadair.github.io/udp-ipfix/Joe-Review/draft-ietf-opsawg-tsvwg-udp-ipfix.txt>.
 Your review on these changes is more than welcome.

Cheers,
Med

De : Aitken, Paul <pait...@ciena.com>
Envoyé : mercredi 8 mai 2024 11:42
À : drafts-expert-review-comm...@iana.org; BOUCADAIR Mohamed INNOV/NET 
<mohamed.boucad...@orange.com>
Cc : ie-doct...@ietf.org; opsawg <opsawg@ietf.org>
Objet : Re: [Ie-doctors] [IANA #1363824] Expert review for 
draft-ietf-opsawg-tsvwg-udp-ipfix (ipfix)



* 3. UDP Options at a Glance

    Add "to" :

    e.g., to discover a path MTU or share timestamps

[Med] OK.



* 4. New UDP IPFIX Information Elements

The URLs in the "note" should be listed in the references. The note should say 
"to be updated / removed by the RFC editor".

[Med] Makes sense. Done.



* 4.2. and 4.3. / Description
The information is encoded in a set of 16-bit fields. Each 16-bit
field carries the observed ExID in an EXP option.
I mis-parsed this as if each 16-bit field carries an EXP option: "Each 16-bit 
field carries the observed ExID / in an EXP option."

It may be clearer as, "Each 16-bit field carries the ExID which was observed in 
an EXP option."

[Med] ACK.


* 4.2. and 4.3.

No mention is made of whether ordering is important or unimportant.

[Med] It is not important as we are silent about it.



* 5. Examples

Add "a":

    If a udpOptions IE is exported for this Flow,

[Med] OK



* Under Figure 2:
Let us now consider a UDP Flow in which both SAFE and UNSAFE
Experimental options are observed. Let us also consider that the
observed SAFE Experimental options have ExIDs set to 0x9858 and
0xE2D4, and UNSAFE Experimental options have ExIDs set to 0xC3D9 and
0x9858.
The last 0x9858 should be 0x9658 to correspond with the following point 2 and 
Figure 4.

0x9858 and 0x9658 are very similar. Could more distinct values be used?

[Med] We are using the same value to exemplify that the same ExID may be 
present in both safe and unsafe shared options.


* Figure 3:
If udpOptions IE is exported for this Flow, then that IE will
have bits in positions 127 (EXP) and 254 (UEXP) set to 1 (Figure 
3<https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/html/draft-ietf-opsawg-tsvwg-udp-ipfix#ex-udp-shared>).

The goal is to set bits 127 and 254, so it's confusing to see what appears to 
be bits 1 and 128 set:

MSB                                                     LSB

                    12                          25

 0 1 2 3 ... 7 8 9 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 ... 8 9 0 1 2 3 4 5

+-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

|X|1|X|X|   |X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|1|X|X|   |X|X|X|X|X|X|X|

+-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-++-++-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

Intuitively one would expect to see these bits:

MSB                                                     LSB

                    12                          25

 0 1 2 3 ... 7 8 9 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 ... 8 9 0 1 2 3 4 5

+-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

|X|X|X|X|   |X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|1|X|X|X|   |X|X|X|X|X|1|X|

+-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-++-++-+-+-+-+...+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

However since bit 2^n is set for option n, the problem is really with the 
misleading bit numbering in the figure.

ie, the example would be clearer without the numbering.
[Med] Made some changes. Hope this is better.
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