Many thanks for this work! As part of my AD review of this draft, I have a few easy comments. I recognize that I'm sending this during the holiday season, so please don't interrupt whatever holiday plans you have to respond. The earliest I can put this draft into IETF Last Call is on 2 Jan 2025.
Deb ------------------------------------- General: There is no BCP 14 language? Are there really no 'requirements' on how future transforms are specified? Or because this is all in IANA, it isn't required? I'm happy to be corrected on this. Section 1, para 1, sentence 2: 'which is called there anti-replay'/'which is called anti-replay'. Section 1, para 1, sentence 3: I can't tell what the word 'individually' applies to in the phrase, 'each receiver of AH and ESP packets individually selects whether to enable it'. A singe receiver gets both AH and ESP packets which they can choose to enable anti-replay on either ESP, AH, or both? If it means that for each connection (where a 'connection' is AH or ESP), the receiver has to enable anti-replay, then maybe: 'each receiver of AH and/or ESP packets can choose whether to enable it on a per connection basis'. Or something else? Section 1, para 2, last sentence: deduced/calculated? (deduced means drawing a logical conclusion, which means they might draw the wrong conclusion?) Section 1, para 4, sentence 3: 'performed via so called transforms'/'performed via transforms'. End of Section 1, or Section 2: I'd like the phrase 'updates RFC 7296' slid in somewhere here. I think the last paragraph of Section 2 might be the best place. But I'm happy to see it done anywhere in these two sections. [Note: the 'Introduction' is more of a preface, setting the stage, vice an overview.] Section 2, last para, first sentence: 'Transform type 5 looks like an appropriate candidate'/'Transform type 5 is an appropriate candidate', or even better 'Transform type 5 is the best candidate'. (is there another option?) Section 3, idnits line numbers 192-194: I'm having trouble parsing this. How about 'When a new transform ID is defined, there will be a description of the sequence number properties that includes a discussion on which protocols can be used if this transform ID is selected.' If this is what is intended, is it actually possible to do the last part? One would have to consider all protocols that utilize IPsec, and say whether a new transform can be utilized? On Mon, Dec 16, 2024 at 8:04 AM Valery Smyslov <smyslov.i...@gmail.com> wrote: > Hi, > > this version addresses comments made during WGLC. > > Regards, > Valery. > > > -----Original Message----- > > From: internet-dra...@ietf.org <internet-dra...@ietf.org> > > Sent: Monday, December 16, 2024 4:01 PM > > To: i-d-annou...@ietf.org > > Cc: ipsec@ietf.org > > Subject: [IPsec] I-D Action: draft-ietf-ipsecme-ikev2-rename-esn-01.txt > > > > Internet-Draft draft-ietf-ipsecme-ikev2-rename-esn-01.txt is now > available. It is a > > work item of the IP Security Maintenance and Extensions (IPSECME) WG of > the > > IETF. > > > > Title: Renaming Extended Sequence Number (ESN) Transform Type in the > > Internet Key Exchange Protocol Version 2 (IKEv2) > > Author: Valery Smyslov > > Name: draft-ietf-ipsecme-ikev2-rename-esn-01.txt > > Pages: 9 > > Dates: 2024-12-16 > > > > Abstract: > > > > This documents clarifies and extends the meaning of transform type 5 > > in IKEv2. It updates RFC 7296 by renaming the transform type 5 from > > "Extended Sequence Numbers (ESN)" to "Sequence Numbers Properties > > (SNP)". It also renames two currently defined values for this > > transform type: value 0 from "No Extended Sequence Numbers" to > > "32-bit Sequential Numbers" and value 1 from "Extended Sequence > > Numbers" to "Partially Transmitted 64-bit Sequential Numbers". > > > > The IETF datatracker status page for this Internet-Draft is: > > https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-ipsecme-ikev2-rename-esn/ > > > > There is also an HTMLized version available at: > > > https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/html/draft-ietf-ipsecme-ikev2-rename-esn-01 > > > > A diff from the previous version is available at: > > > https://author-tools.ietf.org/iddiff?url2=draft-ietf-ipsecme-ikev2-rename-esn-01 > > > > Internet-Drafts are also available by rsync at: > > rsync.ietf.org::internet-drafts > > > > > > _______________________________________________ > > IPsec mailing list -- ipsec@ietf.org > > To unsubscribe send an email to ipsec-le...@ietf.org > > _______________________________________________ > IPsec mailing list -- ipsec@ietf.org > To unsubscribe send an email to ipsec-le...@ietf.org >
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