Hi Roman, thank you for your comments.
> Roman Danyliw has entered the following ballot position for > draft-ietf-ipsecme-ikev2-intermediate-09: No Objection > > When responding, please keep the subject line intact and reply to all > email addresses included in the To and CC lines. (Feel free to cut this > introductory paragraph, however.) > > > Please refer to > https://www.ietf.org/about/groups/iesg/statements/handling-ballot-positions/ > for more information about how to handle DISCUSS and COMMENT positions. > > > The document, along with other ballot positions, can be found here: > https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-ipsecme-ikev2-intermediate/ > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > COMMENT: > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > > A few editorial items: > > ** Section 1. Editorial. s/If size of/If the size of/ Fixed. > ** Section 1. Editorial. Per “… that may interfere badly with some network > devices”, can something more precise than “interfere badly” be used? Perhaps: > > OLD: > That may interfere badly with some network devices > > NEW > Which has been shown to cause operational challenge in certain network > configurations and devices. Changed to the suggested text. > ** Section 3.3.2. Editorial. Per “… because peers generally are unaware in > which form other side has received them”, there is a missing word here. I tried to rephrase this part: "... because implementations are generally unaware in which form these messages are received by peers." Is it better or still requires polishing? > ** Section 3.3.2. Editorial. s/After n-th exchange/After the n-th exchange/ Fixed. > **Section 3.3.2. Editorial. > OLD > The IntAuth_[i/r]*A chunk lasts from ... > > NEW > The IntAuth [i/r]*A chunk consists of the sequence of octets from ... Done (I have a feeling that this sentence contains too many words "octet", but let RFC Editor think about this). > ** Section 8. Typo. s/regadless/regardless/ Typo, fixed. Thank you! Regards, Valery. _______________________________________________ IPsec mailing list IPsec@ietf.org https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/ipsec
