I think I've posted this here before; feel free to ignore it if you recognize it:
Jack was a COBOL programmer in the late 1990s who (after years of being taken for granted and treated as a technological dinosaur by all the UNIX programmers and Client/Server programmers and website developers etc) was finally getting some respect. You see, he'd become a private consultant specializing in Year-2000 conversions. He was working short-term assignments for prestigious companies, traveling all over the world on different assignments. He was working 70- and 80- and even 90-hour weeks, but it was worth it. However, several years of this relentless, mind-numbing work had taken its toll on Jack. He had problems sleeping and began having anxiety dreams about the year 2000. It had reached a point where even the thought of the year 2000 made him nearly violent. He must have suffered some sort of breakdown, because all he could think about was how he could avoid the year 2000 and all that came with it. By the end of 1997 Jack had decided to contact a company that specialized in cryogenics. He made a deal to have himself frozen until 2001 through their totally automated (and very expensive) process. He was thrilled. The next thing he would know, he'd wake up in the year 2001 -- after the New Year celebrations and computer debacles, after the leap year, and after the dust had settled. Nothing else to worry about except getting on with his life. He was put into his cryogenic receptacle, the technicians set the revive date, he was given injections to slow his heartbeat to a bare minimum, and that was that. The next thing Jack saw was an enormous and very modern room filled with excited people. They were all shouting "I can't believe it!" and "It's a miracle" and "He's alive!". There were cameras (unlike any he'd ever seen) and equipment that looked like it came out of a science fiction movie. Someone who was obviously a spokesperson for the group stepped forward. Jack couldn't contain his enthusiasm. "It's over?" he asked. "Is 2001 already here? Are all the millennial parties and promotions and crises all over and done with?" The spokesman explained that there had been a problem with the programming of the timer on Jack's cryogenic receptacle. It hadn't been year-2000 compliant; it was actually 8000 years later, not the year 2001. But the spokesman told Jack that he shouldn't get excited; someone important wanted to speak to him. Suddenly a wall-sized projection screen displayed the image of a man that had a striking resemblance to Bill Gates. This man was Prime Minister of Earth. He told Jack not to be upset. That this was a wonderful time to be alive. That there was world peace and no more starvation. That the space program had been reïnstated and there were colonies on the moon and on Mars. That technology had advanced to such a degree that everyone had virtual-reality interfaces that allowed them to contact anyone else on the planet, or to watch any entertainment, or to hear any music recorded anywhere. "That sounds terrific," said Jack. "But I'm curious: Why is everybody so interested in me?" "Well," said the Prime Minister. "The year 10 000 is just around the corner, and it says in your files you know COBOL..." --- Bob Bridges, robhbrid...@gmail.com, cell 336 382-7313 /* If you're not paying for it you're not the customer, and if you're not the customer, you must be the merchandise. -about "free" internet services */ -----Original Message----- From: IBM Mainframe Discussion List <IBM-MAIN@LISTSERV.UA.EDU> On Behalf Of Matt Hogstrom Sent: Tuesday, July 26, 2022 16:19 We got on the subject of the “Y2K problem” at dinner the other night. My 14-year-old daughter said, “Why was everyone worked up about it? Nothing happened. It couldn’t have been that big of a deal.” Like most of you, having lived through it people did a huge amount of work and testing, not to mention, spent billions of dollars and time to address issues. Her cavalier comment really took me by surprise but, she was born 7 years after the event so in her worldview its just history that doesn’t affect her. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- For IBM-MAIN subscribe / signoff / archive access instructions, send email to lists...@listserv.ua.edu with the message: INFO IBM-MAIN
