Linda,
On 3/27/23 3:34 AM, Linda Dunbar wrote:
Paul,
Revision based on your comments and suggestions has been uploaded:
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-rtgwg-net2cloud-problem-statement/
I rechecked, and you got almost all of my nits. There is still a
formatting error in bullet (a) of section 3.5. And several things
reported by IdNits remain. (The formatting error is also detected by
IdNits as a long line.)
This will give you the IdNits report:
https://author-tools.ietf.org/api/idnits?url=https://www.ietf.org/archive/id/draft-ietf-rtgwg-net2cloud-problem-statement-22.txt&submissioncheck=True
If you fix those I will be able to resolve all my concerns.
You should always run IdNits on a draft before submitting it. While it
doesn't catch everything and it can be over-zealous its report is very
helpful.
Thanks,
Paul
Hope you can change your review status with this new revision.
Thank you,
Linda
-----Original Message-----
From: Paul Kyzivat <pkyzi...@alum.mit.edu>
Sent: Thursday, March 23, 2023 10:20 PM
To: Linda Dunbar <linda.dun...@futurewei.com>;
draft-ietf-rtgwg-net2cloud-problem-statement....@ietf.org
Cc: General Area Review Team <gen-art@ietf.org>; rt...@ietf.org
Subject: Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Early review of
draft-ietf-rtgwg-net2cloud-problem-statement-21
Linda,
I finally convinced the review tracking system to recognize my revision to the
review.
Sorry for the trouble,
Paul
On 3/22/23 5:07 PM, Paul Kyzivat wrote:
Linda,
On 3/22/23 4:48 PM, Linda Dunbar wrote:
Paul,
Thank you very much. Can you please change the review status for the
draft?
I haven't seen a revised version yet. But I withdrew my only issue I
just sent a revised review that removes it and leaves only the nits.
I'm currently struggling with the review tracking system to get the
status change recorded there, but will do so.
Thanks,
Paul
Thank you very much,
Linda
-----Original Message-----
From: Paul Kyzivat <pkyzi...@alum.mit.edu>
Sent: Wednesday, March 22, 2023 9:25 AM
To: Linda Dunbar <linda.dun...@futurewei.com>;
draft-ietf-rtgwg-net2cloud-problem-statement....@ietf.org
Cc: General Area Review Team <gen-art@ietf.org>; rt...@ietf.org
Subject: Re: Gen-ART Early review of
draft-ietf-rtgwg-net2cloud-problem-statement-21
Hi Linda,
On 3/21/23 8:10 PM, Linda Dunbar wrote:
Paul,
Thank you very much for the review.
Please see below for the resolution to your comments.
The revision will be uploaded next Monday when the IETF submission
opens.
Linda
I've included some followup comments inline below.
[snip]
ISSUE (MINOR)
The intended purpose of and audience for this document isn't clear.
I infer this is primarily intended to kick off and guide further
normative standards work, and hence the audience is other IETF
participants. It would be helpful to spell this out. The abstract
notes things that are out of scope. Clarifying the audience and
purpose would also help in determining scope.
[Linda] How about adding the following statement?
/The intent is primarily for guiding further standards work in the
Routing Area./
After rereading the relevant sections I think I was wrong to raise an
issue - you seem to have sufficiently explained the intent without
making any changes.
[snip]
* Section 3.2
Something is wrong with the grammar in:
"When those failure events happen, the Cloud DC GW which is visible
to clients are running fine."
It can be fixed by s/clients are/clients is/, if that is what you mean.
[Linda] Is the following statement more clear?
/When a site failure happens, the Cloud DC GW visible to clients is
running fine; therefore, the site failure is not detectable by the
Clients using BFD. /
Yes, that reads well.
[snip]
[Linda] Changed the statement to the following:
/Many applications have multiple instances instantiated in different
Cloud DCs. A commonly deployed solution has DNS server(s) responding
to an FQDN (Fully Qualified Domain Name) inquiry with an IP address
of the closest or lowest cost DC that can reach the instance. /
Sounds good.
[snip]
Thanks,
Paul
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