From: "Julia Thompson" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>

> Michael Harney wrote:
>
> > P.P.P.S.  I've been in a particularly strange mood for a long while now
(a
> > few weeks), perhaps stress induced, and encourage others to keep a safe
> > distance from topics I feel strongly about.
>
> Sorry to hear that, and if I start in on something you feel strongly
> about, I may have forgotten that you feel strongly about it.  Blame the
> sleep deprivation.  (Although it's getting better....)


I wouldn't worry too much about it.  The topics that I am sensative about
are not ones that you tend to bring up, and when you do, you usually do so
in a way that is not construed as an attack or challenge, but in the
interest of genuine discussion.  That, I can typically handle even when I am
feeling as I am.  I am feeling quite unwell though.  Things have even gotten
to the point that I am even consuming caffine at mid-day to maintain
concentration.  I have been limiting my caffine consumption for years now,
consuming it only on rare occasion.  It is a surprisingly potent drug when
used sparingly, but I would rather not use it at all.  Prolonged use of
caffine (use spanning 4-5 days) typically makes me feel short of breath
(which is quite unpleasant) and affects my metabolism for the worse.

My moods seem to be forming a pattern though, last year at this time, I was
feeling badly as well (though, greatfully, this year hasn't been nearly as
bad as last year).  Hopefully, it will clear up faster than last year, which
spanned right through to the end of February.  Part of it is related to
holidays.  I feel badly around Christmas because I am unemployed and unable
to buy other people gifts.  I feel bad in January around my birthday because
I'm reminded that another year has gone by and things haven't gotten any
better.  And I am depressed around Valentine's day because I am reminded
that I am alone, have been alone all my life, and am likely to be alone the
rest of my life if the trend continues.  In short, Holidays and Birthdays
suck for someone stuck in a rut.  Hopefully one of my job leads will pan out
before my birthday rolls around so that I will at least feel better about
that.

Michael Harney
[EMAIL PROTECTED]

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