Authors and *AD,

While reviewing this document during AUTH48, please resolve (as
necessary) the following questions, which are also in the XML file.

*AD, please see #18.

1) <!--[rfced] How may we clarify the latter part of this sentence?

Original:
   These extensions empower a PCE to calculate
   and manage paths specifically for native IP networks, expand PCEP's
   capabilities beyond its traditional use in MPLS and GMPLS networks.

Perhaps:
   These extensions empower a PCE to calculate
   and manage paths specifically for native IP networks, thereby expanding
   PCEP's capabilities beyond its traditional use in MPLS and GMPLS networks.
-->   


2) <!--[rfced] To avoid awkward hyphenation, may we update the text below
as follows?

Original:
   [RFC8821] describes the architecture and solution philosophy for the E2E
   traffic assurance in the Native IP network via multiple Border
   Gateway Protocol (BGP) sessions-based solution.

Perhaps:
   [RFC8821] describes the architecture and solution philosophy for the E2E
   traffic assurance in the Native IP network via a solution based on
   multiple Border Gateway Protocol (BGP) sessions.
-->


3) <!-- [rfced] This sentence implies that the status of this document
could change in the future. May we update the text to state that
a new document would be published in order to update the status?

Original:
   Feedback from deployments will be
   crucial in determining whether this specification should advance from
   Experimental to the IETF Standards Track.

Perhaps:
   Feedback from deployments will be
   crucial in determining whether a future document will be published to 
   advance this specification from Experimental to the IETF Standards Track.
-->


4) <!--[rfced] Does "their" refer to "PCECC-CAPABILITY sub-TLV"? If 
yes, may we update "their" to "its" for clarity?

Original:
   [RFC9050] defined the PCECC-CAPABILITY sub-TLV to exchange
   information about their PCECC capability.

Perhaps:
   [RFC9050] defined the PCECC-CAPABILITY sub-TLV to exchange
   information about its PCECC capability.
-->   


5) <!--[rfced] To improve readability, may we update this sentence as
follows? Please review and ensure that the suggested text does not alter
the intended meaning.

Original:
   The PCECC Native IP TE solution uses the existing PCE Label Switched
   Path (LSP) Initiate Request message (PCInitiate) [RFC8281], and PCE 
   Report message (PCRpt) [RFC8231] to accomplish the multiple BGP 
   sessions establishment, E2E Native-IP TE path deployment, and route 
   prefixes advertisement among different BGP sessions.

Perhaps:
   The PCECC Native IP TE solution uses the existing PCE Label Switched 
   Path (LSP) Initiate Request message (PCInitiate) [RFC8281] and PCE
   Report message (PCRpt) [RFC8231] to establish multiple BGP sessions,
   deploy the E2E Native-IP TE path, and advertise route prefixes
   among different BGP sessions.
-->


6) <!-- [rfced] Please review the "type" attribute of each sourcecode element
in the XML file to ensure correctness. If the current list of preferred
values for "type"
(https://www.rfc-editor.org/rpc/wiki/doku.php?id=sourcecode-types)
does not contain an applicable type, then feel free to let us know.
Also, it is acceptable to leave the "type" attribute not set.  
-->


7) <!--[rfced] May we make the following sentences more concise by removing
"instance of"? Please review the suggested text and let us know if this
change alters the intended meaning. 

Original:
   If there is
   more than one instance of BPI, EPR or PPA object present, the
   receiving PCC MUST send a PCErr message with Error-type=19 (Invalid
   Operation) and Error-value=22 (Only one BPI, EPR or PPA object can be
   included in this message).
   ...
   If there are
   more than one instance of BPI, EPR or PPA objects present, the
   receiving PCE MUST send a PCErr message with Error-type=19 (Invalid
   Operation) and Error-value=22 (Only one BPI, EPR or PPA object can be
   included in this message).

Perhaps:
   If there is
   more than one BPI, EPR, or PPA object present, the
   receiving PCC MUST send a PCErr message with Error-type=19 (Invalid
   Operation) and Error-value=22 (Only one BPI, EPR, or PPA object can be
   included in this message).
   ...
   If there is
   more than one BPI, EPR, or PPA object present, the
   receiving PCE MUST send a PCErr message with Error-type=19 (Invalid
   Operation) and Error-value=22 (Only one BPI, EPR, or PPA object can be
   included in this message).
-->     


8) <!--[rfced] To avoid the repetition of "object", may we update the
sentence below?

Original:
   Furthermore, one, and only one, object among BPI, EPR or PPA object
   MUST be present.

Perhaps:
   Furthermore, one and only one BPI, EPR, or PPA object MUST be present.
-->


9) <!--[rfced] How may we clarify "to the same destination"?

Original:
   If there is traffic
   from different attached points to the same destination coming into
   the network, they could share the priority path which may not be the
   initial desire.

Perhaps:
   If traffic is coming into the network from different attached points
   but to the same destination, they could share the priority path, 
   which may not be the initial desire.
-->   


10) <!--[rfced] We don't see the term "IPinIP" in RFC 2003. Should this be
updated as "IP in IP"? Note that other RFCs generally use "IP-in-IP"
when referring to tunnels.

We also see "IPnIP" in Table 8 - is this term the same as "IPinIP" or
different? Please let us know if/how these terms may be updated for 
consistency.

Original:
 Section 6.4
   For simplicity, the IPinIP tunnel type [RFC2003] is used between the
   BGP peers by default.

 Section 7.2
   Currently, only bit 7 (T bit) is defined.  When the T bit is set,
   the traffic SHOULD be sent in the IPinIP tunnel (Tunnel source
   is Local IP Address, tunnel destination is Peer IP Address).

 Table 8
   7   | T (IPnIP) bit | 
-->


11) <!--[rfced] Per use elsewhere throughout the document, should "R flag"
be updated to "R bit"?

Original:
   To remove the Native-IP state from the PCC, the PCE MUST send
   explicit CCI cleanup instructions for PPA, EPR and BPI objects
   respectively with the R flag set in the SRP object.

Perhaps:
   To remove the Native-IP state from the PCC, the PCE MUST send
   explicit CCI cleanup instructions for PPA, EPR, and BPI objects,
   respectively, with the R bit set in the SRP object.
-->   


12) <!--[rfced] FYI - To match Sections 7.2 and 7.3, we have updated
the single sentence preceding Figures 14 and 15 in Section 7.4 to
be two sentences, one preceding each figure, respectively. Please
review and let us know of any objections. 

Original:
   The format of the Peer Prefix Advertisement object body is as
   follows:

Current:
   The format of the Peer Prefix Advertisement object body for IPv4
   is as follows:
   ...
   The format of the Peer Prefix Advertisement object body for IPv6
   is as follows:
-->


13) <!-- [rfced] Table 1: Rather than have two tables with the same
information, may we point readers to Table 5 in the IANA
Considerations section as shown below?

Current (Section 8):
   An additional Error-Type and several Error-values are defined to
   represent the errors related to the newly defined objects that are
   related to Native IP TE procedures.

Perhaps:
   An additional Error-Type and several Error-values are defined to
   represent the errors related to the newly defined objects that are
   related to Native IP TE procedures. See Table 5 (Section 13.4) for 
   the newly defined Error-Type and Error-values.
-->


14) <!--[rfced] To have a 1:1 matchup between the acronym and its expansion, may
we update "LSP-DB" as follows, i.e., remove "State" from the expansion?

Original:
   ...treat the three newly defined objects (BPI, EPR and PPA) associated
   with the same symbolic path name as the attribute of the same path in
   the LSP-DB (LSP State Database).

Perhaps:
   ...treat the three newly defined objects (BPI, EPR, and PPA) associated
   with the same symbolic path name as the attribute of the same path in
   the LSP Database (LSP-DB).
-->


15) <!--[rfced] Is the intended meaning that the mechanisms in this
document and the mechanisms listed in RFC 5440 do not imply any
new liveness detection and monitoring? If so, may we rephrase the
text as shown below for clarity?

Original:
   Mechanisms defined in this document do not imply any new liveness
   detection and monitoring requirements in addition to those already
   listed in [RFC5440].

Perhaps:
   Mechanisms defined in this document, and those already listed in 
   [RFC5440], do not imply any new liveness detection and monitoring 
   requirements.
-->


16) <!--[rfced] Does "it" refer to a suitable default value? If so, may we
clarify the text as follows?

Original:
   If suitable default values as discussed in Section 9 aren't enough
   and securing the BGP transport is required(for example, the TCP-AO
   [RFC5925], it can be provided through the addition of optional TLVs
   to the BGP Peer Info object that conveys the necessary additional
   information (for example, a key chain [RFC8177]name).

Perhaps:
   If the suitable default values discussed in Section 9 aren't enough
   and securing the BGP transport is required (for example, by using 
   TCP-AO [RFC5925]), a suitable value can be provided through the 
   addition of optional TLVs to the BGP Peer Info object that conveys 
   the necessary additional information (for example, a key chain 
   [RFC8177] name).
-->   


17) <!-- [rfced] We have included a clarification about the IANA text
below. In addition to reviewing it, please review all of the
IANA-related updates carefully and let us know if any further
updates are needed.

) FYI: In Table 4, we have added "Object-Type" to each name and have added
"0: Reserved" accordingly to match the "PCEP Objects" registry (see 
<https://www.iana.org/assignments/pcep/>).
-->


18) <!--[rfced] *AD - Per the following note left in the document by the 
authors,
we have removed the normative reference [I-D.ietf-pce-iana-update]. Please 
review and approve of this update. 

Original:
   Editorial Note (To be removed by RFC Editor): This experimental track
   document is allocating a code point in the registry under the
   standards action registry which is not allowed.
   [I-D.ietf-pce-iana-update] updates the registration policy to IETF
   review allowing for this allocation.  Note that an early allocation
   was made when the document was being progressed in the standards
   track.  At the time of publication, please remove this note and the
   reference to [I-D.ietf-pce-iana-update].
-->   


19) <!-- [rfced] The following reference is not cited in the text.  Please let
us know where it should be cited; otherwise, it will be deleted from the 
references section.

   [RFC7942]  Sheffer, Y. and A. Farrel, "Improving Awareness of Running
              Code: The Implementation Status Section", BCP 205,
              RFC 7942, DOI 10.17487/RFC7942, July 2016,
              <https://www.rfc-editor.org/info/rfc7942>.
-->


20) <!-- [rfced] FYI - We have added expansions for the following abbreviations
per Section 3.6 of RFC 7322 ("RFC Style Guide"). Please review each
expansion in the document carefully to ensure correctness.

 Path Computation Client (PCC)
 PCEP-specific LSP identifiers (PLSP-ID)
 TCP Authentication Option (TCP-AO)
-->


21) <!-- [rfced] Terminology

a) Throughout the text, the following terminology appears to be used 
inconsistently. Please review these occurrences and let us know if/how 
they may be made consistent.

 Local/Peer IP Address vs. Local/Peer IP address

 Native IP vs. Native-IP vs. native IP vs. NATIVE IP
  [Note: These differences are also found within the 
  IANA registries.]

 Peer IPv4 Address vs. peer IPv4 address
 Peer IPv6 Address vs. peer IPv6 address 

b) May we update the following terms to the form on the right in the
running text for consistency?

 central controller instructions > Central Controller Instructions (per RFC 
9050)
 code point > codepoint (per RFC 9050 and to match the companion document)
 Error-type > Error-Type
 Error-Value > Error-value
 Object type, object type > Object-Type
 PCE-Initiated > PCE-initiated (per RFC 8281)
 PCEP Speakers > PCEP speakers
 PCInitiate Message > PCInitiate message
 state synchronization > State Synchronization (per RFCs 8232 and 9050)
 Symbolic Path Name > symbolic path name (per RFC 8232)
 Remote Peer > remote peer (per RFC 8232)

 PCEP Object > PCEP object
 BPI Object > BPI object
 CCI Object > CCI object

c) We note three instances of "PCEP protocol". Since this reads as 
"Path Computation Element Communication Protocol protocol" when 
expanded, may we remove "protocol" when it occurs after "PCEP"?

d) FYI: We note "Central Control Dynamic Routing" vs. "Centralized 
Control Dynamic Routing" for the expansion of "CCDR". We have 
updated the text to reflect the latter form per use in RFCs 8735 
and 8821.

 Central Control Dynamic Routing > Centralized Control Dynamic Routing
-->


22) <!-- [rfced] Please review the "Inclusive Language" portion of the online
Style Guide <https://www.rfc-editor.org/styleguide/part2/#inclusive_language>
and let us know if any changes are needed.  Updates of this nature typically
result in more precise language, which is helpful for readers. 

For example, please consider whether the following should be updated:
  - traditional
  - native
-->


Thank you.

RFC Editor/ap/kc


On Mar 03, 2025, at 12:15 AM, rfc-edi...@rfc-editor.org wrote:

*****IMPORTANT*****

Updated 2025/03/03

RFC Author(s):
--------------

Instructions for Completing AUTH48

Your document has now entered AUTH48.  Once it has been reviewed and 
approved by you and all coauthors, it will be published as an RFC.  
If an author is no longer available, there are several remedies 
available as listed in the FAQ (https://www.rfc-editor.org/faq/).

You and you coauthors are responsible for engaging other parties 
(e.g., Contributors or Working Group) as necessary before providing 
your approval.

Planning your review 
---------------------

Please review the following aspects of your document:

*  RFC Editor questions

   Please review and resolve any questions raised by the RFC Editor 
   that have been included in the XML file as comments marked as 
   follows:

   <!-- [rfced] ... -->

   These questions will also be sent in a subsequent email.

*  Changes submitted by coauthors 

   Please ensure that you review any changes submitted by your 
   coauthors.  We assume that if you do not speak up that you 
   agree to changes submitted by your coauthors.

*  Content 

   Please review the full content of the document, as this cannot 
   change once the RFC is published.  Please pay particular attention to:
   - IANA considerations updates (if applicable)
   - contact information
   - references

*  Copyright notices and legends

   Please review the copyright notice and legends as defined in
   RFC 5378 and the Trust Legal Provisions 
   (TLP – https://trustee.ietf.org/license-info).

*  Semantic markup

   Please review the markup in the XML file to ensure that elements of  
   content are correctly tagged.  For example, ensure that <sourcecode> 
   and <artwork> are set correctly.  See details at 
   <https://authors.ietf.org/rfcxml-vocabulary>.

*  Formatted output

   Please review the PDF, HTML, and TXT files to ensure that the 
   formatted output, as generated from the markup in the XML file, is 
   reasonable.  Please note that the TXT will have formatting 
   limitations compared to the PDF and HTML.


Submitting changes
------------------

To submit changes, please reply to this email using ‘REPLY ALL’ as all 
the parties CCed on this message need to see your changes. The parties 
include:

   *  your coauthors
   
   *  rfc-edi...@rfc-editor.org (the RPC team)

   *  other document participants, depending on the stream (e.g., 
      IETF Stream participants are your working group chairs, the 
      responsible ADs, and the document shepherd).
     
   *  auth48archive@rfc-editor.org, which is a new archival mailing list 
      to preserve AUTH48 conversations; it is not an active discussion 
      list:
     
     *  More info:
        
https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/ietf-announce/yb6lpIGh-4Q9l2USxIAe6P8O4Zc
     
     *  The archive itself:
        https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/browse/auth48archive/

     *  Note: If only absolutely necessary, you may temporarily opt out 
        of the archiving of messages (e.g., to discuss a sensitive matter).
        If needed, please add a note at the top of the message that you 
        have dropped the address. When the discussion is concluded, 
        auth48archive@rfc-editor.org will be re-added to the CC list and 
        its addition will be noted at the top of the message. 

You may submit your changes in one of two ways:

An update to the provided XML file
 — OR —
An explicit list of changes in this format

Section # (or indicate Global)

OLD:
old text

NEW:
new text

You do not need to reply with both an updated XML file and an explicit 
list of changes, as either form is sufficient.

We will ask a stream manager to review and approve any changes that seem
beyond editorial in nature, e.g., addition of new text, deletion of text, 
and technical changes.  Information about stream managers can be found in 
the FAQ.  Editorial changes do not require approval from a stream manager.


Approving for publication
--------------------------

To approve your RFC for publication, please reply to this email stating
that you approve this RFC for publication.  Please use ‘REPLY ALL’,
as all the parties CCed on this message need to see your approval.


Files 
-----

The files are available here:
   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9757.xml
   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9757.html
   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9757.pdf
   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9757.txt

Diff file of the text:
   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9757-diff.html
   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9757-rfcdiff.html (side by side)

Diff of the XML: 
   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9757-xmldiff1.html


Tracking progress
-----------------

The details of the AUTH48 status of your document are here:
   https://www.rfc-editor.org/auth48/rfc9757

Please let us know if you have any questions.  

Thank you for your cooperation,

RFC Editor

--------------------------------------
RFC9757 (draft-ietf-pce-pcep-extension-native-ip-40)

Title            : Path Computation Element Communication Protocol (PCEP) 
Extensions for Native IP Networks
Author(s)        : A. Wang, B. Khasanov, S. Fang, R. Tan, C. Zhu
WG Chair(s)      : Julien Meuric, Dhruv Dhody

Area Director(s) : Jim Guichard, John Scudder, Gunter Van de Velde


-- 
auth48archive mailing list -- auth48archive@rfc-editor.org
To unsubscribe send an email to auth48archive-le...@rfc-editor.org

Reply via email to