After doing a bit of research on this particular issue, I've come to a
few of my own conclusions. I'll start by running down the issue.

Hardware: the slim aluminum wired(although perhaps also wireless; same issues 
anyone?) apple keyboard. 
Problem: the clear (numlock) key renders the keyboard practically useless. That 
is to say, it doesn't turn numlock on for the keypad, and disables _most_ other 
input from the keyboard (more on this later).

Diagnosis: according to this post
(https://bugs.launchpad.net/ubuntu/+source/linux/+bug/162083), there was
an issue with the macbook keyboard; the fn key was patched to restore
function of the fn key. In that same line of update, I believe the
laptop functions of this particular keyboard were addressed. I'm
uncertain, but somewhere along the lines the keyboard was introduced
into the kernel and fixed to work correctly (fn keys, additional
numerical keys: *-+/= ).  I believe this has also inversely affected
these slim apple keyboards recently introduced. The kernel just sees it
as the laptop version, and assigns the keymaps accordingly (assumption,
as I have no technical experience in the matter; just my own deductions
and research here, mind you).

For those who aren't quite sure of what's going on, here's a bit of a recap:
The numpad is needed, and numlock isn't on by default (this can be changed, but 
doesn't address the issue). Pressing the clear button on most models of apple 
keyboards is equivalent to the numlock key on a PC. In this particular case, 
since the kernel doesn't see the keyboard as a generic usb keyboard anymore 
(it's a macbook now), this key is remapped to whatever enables the numpad for 
its device. In this case, since it's a laptop, it's enabling the /*-+ keys on 
the Alpha keys, appropriate to where they'd be on the laptop. (This would be 
correct, were we actually using that model of keyboard.) After the clear key is 
pressed, the numpad still no longer works, and now all other functions of the 
keyboard are disabled except for the *-+ keys and the F6 key (more on this 
later). No other keys process (AFAIK). The mouse still works, and a log out 
restores functionality.

Fix: This is an issue. Although the keyboard is acting appropriately for
how it's assigned, it's not right. The fn key isn't helpful on a full-
sized keyboard (in fact it's rather harmful, as alt+fn+f1 is a pretty
big stretch for my tiny hands), and neither are the remaps of the
numerical keys, since we have a numpad. It's especially less so if the
numlock renders the rest of the keyboard useless. What is needed is for
the kernel to recognize this particular keyboard differently from the
laptop version. I suppose a generic usb keyboard remapping would work
essentially the same, but the fn key would then be useless, unless
remaped to insert, like my old apple keyboard was. Alternatively, it
would be nice to preserve the media, brightness, et cetera keys by
assigning them to work with fn pressed. This could work if the fn key
were remapped as a modifier key(right now fn isn't recognized as an
actual key to assign for anything) specific to the media keys and etc
keys. I wouldn't miss them much, but I'm sure some people would much
rather have full functionality out of their keyboards, and this would
cater to them. As for me, I just want my keyboard to work correctly:
numpad and all.

However, since you all like workarounds, and no one seems to be dealing
with this problem... Holding down the F6 key restores my keyboard. I'm
not sure what this would be on the laptop, but it seems to turn off the
numlock and disables the /*-+ keys. After this all other keys work. Just
holding it for a couple seconds works. This does not effect the numlock
status if you have the "Numlock at boot" setting enabled, as the numlock
key is pressed twice (seems the F6-hold counts as a numlock after all);
your numpad will still function. This is especially helpful in World of
Warcraft, since I always seem to accidentally hit the numlock button to
auto-run, forgetting how it screws things up and having to logout to fix
it.

Recap:
Apple USB slim aluminum keyboard is recognized as it's macbook counterpart, 
resulting in problems with the Function keys needing the fn key and the numlock 
button misbehaving. Suggest removing this recognition, and creating a default 
alternative appropriate for a full-sized keyboard which confronts these issues.

-- 
Slim USB Apple Keyboard not working correctly..
https://bugs.launchpad.net/bugs/201887
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