Additional comments:

Chair:
As noted during the meeting, if the deterministic CGN section is to stay in 
this document (we'll call consensus on that separately as a part of WG adoption 
call), the IPR statement from
https://datatracker.ietf.org/ipr/search/?option=document_search&document_search=draft-donley-behave-deterministic-cgn
 will need to be updated to point to this document instead.

Individual:
2.4.1 - worth noting that log size may be governed by legal and company policy 
regarding the length of time a given set of logs must be retained, months vs 
years, and that while a fairly large log with a short storage duration might be 
manageable, a large log coupled with a long duration retention requirement may 
become prohibitively expensive, even with compression and archiving to cheaper 
long-term storage media.
Table 1 - need to specify that this is RAW (uncompressed) log size

Failover considerations shouldn't be specific to deterministic port alloc, 
maybe promote to a main section and expand, or duplicate for section 3, add to 
section 3.4, etc. Basically, with each port allocation method you discuss, you 
need to cover failover considerations. This is especially important if state is 
maintained and must be synced between a primary and backup, or if it operates 
in active/active mode with load balancing, etc.

Need to update section 4.4 with more up-to-date info on IPv6 penetration on 
Alexa top 1M (a lot has changed since 2012), probably including a reference to 
the source for that information so that the reader can follow it to get more 
up-to-date information.

Thanks,

Wes


From: Lee Howard <[email protected]<mailto:[email protected]>>
Date: Thursday, July 24, 2014 at 4:02 PM
To: "[email protected]<mailto:[email protected]>" 
<[email protected]<mailto:[email protected]>>
Subject: [sunset4] review of draft-chen-sunset4-cgn-port-allocation

Doing my homework before the WG meeting this afternoon (and re-sending from the 
correct email address). . .

This document needs significant work and reorganization.

1. Introduction
You say:
provide transparent routing to end hosts
I think it should say:
provide connectivity to end hosts

Is it worth adding a sentence that these methods are only useful for address 
sharing methods, not NPT, and not encapsulation mechanisms?  It may not be 
necessary.
But, for instance, this sentence:
The CGN may not do Network Address Port Translation   (NAPT), but only Network 
Address Translation (NAT) [RFC3022<http://tools.ietf.org/html/rfc3022>].

THat's not an rfc2119 "may not," it's a description of one scenario.  I had to 
read it four times to figure that out; maybe it would be clearer as:

The CGN might do Network Address Port Translation
   (NAPT) without Network Address Translation (NAT) 
[RFC3022<http://tools.ietf.org/html/rfc3022>].  In
   this scenario, there is no concern about port assignment. When NAPT is 
involved, …

Then you can enumerate the "does" and "does not" cases.


independently of the particular flavour should be independent of the particular 
flavour

Section 2.1 Port Consumption on NAT64

This editorializing is unnecessary:

Thanks to its simplicity and efficiency, NAT64 will likely be
   deployed widely.

Also,

 That is, a NAT44 will be deployed in an
   IPv4-only environment.

NAT44 + Native IPv6 is a perfectly reasonable and likely scenario, so this is 
untrue.  But this whole paragraph reads like a sales pitch for NAT64: cut it 
out.

Second paragraph:

One of the authors did a test comparison of port consumption on NAT64
   and NAT44.

Can you just cite the study?  Can you say, "A study of port consumption 
[portstudy]. . ."  Though again, this whole study is only true to a point in 
time (though what version of the Alexa100 includes 43 sites with AAAA I don't 
know).


NAT64 "provides everyone with incentives to use IPv6,"

What incentives?  Does it buy ice cream for everyone who uses IPv6?  Either 
explain, or, since defending the use of NAT64 is out of place in this document, 
remove.


[as v6 transition progresses,] it will be possible to relax the
   multiplexing ratio of IPv4 address sharing.

This is a good point.


 change of IPv4 address will cause
   renumbering of IPv6 addresses.


I don't see how.  But again, I don't think this is intended as a NAT discussion 
document, I thought it was just evaluating port allocation methods.  Clean up 
that paragraph.


It has been learned from subscribers'
          behaviors that the average number of sessions consumed by one
          user's device is around 200 to 300 ports.  Several devices may
          appear behind a CPE.  Administrators may configure a range
          with 1000 ports to each CPE in fixed networks.

Avoid the passive voice.  Can you cite the 200-300 number?  Is that true in 
2014, or for as long as this document is intended to be useful?  Yes, 
administators may configure 1000 ports.  Or 1001.  Or 999.  Maybe what you mean 
is:

 1000 ports per subscriber household will provide enough room for multiple 
active users.  Administrators should monitor usage to adjust this number if 
users are being limited by this number, or if usage is so low that fewer ports 
would be sufficient.


non-contiguous port range for the
      sake of attack defense.

I think you explain this later in the document, but a reference to what you 
mean here would help.

A+P style [citation needed]


2.3.1  Use of the word "older" sounds perjorative.  Do you mean to imply that 
NAT64 is obsolete?  Both in the title and text.

Stepping outside
   the boundaries of NAT64 for the moment, DS-Lite 
[RFC6333<http://tools.ietf.org/html/rfc6333>] refers to
   the cautions in [RFC6269<http://tools.ietf.org/html/rfc6269>] but does not 
specify any port allocation
   method.

First, that's pretty informal language.  Second, why point to DS-Lite pointing 
to RFC6269; why not just point to RFC6269?

2.3.2 Current Work on Stateless Transition Technologies

The proposals made in Section 
3<http://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-chen-sunset4-cgn-port-allocation-04#section-3>
 and Section 
4<http://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-chen-sunset4-cgn-port-allocation-04#section-4>
 do not apply
   to the current work in progress because that work has gone in another
   direction.  That work includes:

Do we need to enumerate protocols that this work doesn't apply to?  If so, then 
I think this document is making normative references to those protocols (since 
their port allocation methods could, potentially, change until they are 
published), which will delay publication until lw4over6, MAP-T, MAP-E, 4rd have 
all been published.  Having said that, this may be a useful comparison of 
possible methods, but I would try to limit it to that.

Sections 2.4.1 and 2.4.2 are excellent.

2.4.3 s/alllocation/allocation

3.1 US means U.S.?  Americans have higher traffic profiles?

3.2 Remove sentence "Here is how dynamic allocation of port-ranges would work 
in greater detail. "

3.3 Section 11 of RFC6269 refers to fragmentation; you mean section 12.  Is 
this section supposed to be a privacy considerations section?  Discoverability? 
 I think in the era of Pervasive Surveillance, reference to other IETF work is 
needed.  Also, please refer to RFC6302.

I'm not sure, though, that the discussion of server port logging is appropriate 
in a document about how to allocate ports in CGN.  A mention of it makes sense, 
but evaluating the capability of different web servers, with a config guide, 
seems out of place.

These "traceability" issues apply equally to all port allocation methods, 
right?  Maybe a Privacy Considerations section at the end.

I didn't review section 4, because I've reviewed it before.  And I ran out of 
time.

5. Security Considerations needs a rewrite—it completely ignores Section 4.

That's all I have on this round.

Lee


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