Never mind. I have found the solution.
The "Document" window in IB 3 must be in list view.
In List, expand the tree of disclosure triangles from Toolbar
Toolbar > Toolbar Item (name if any)
With the Toolbar Item highlighted in List View, it is possible to get
the sizing to stick in IB 3's Inspe
I've noticed that in IB 3, the Minimum and Maximum width of Toolbar
items does not stick. You can enter it, command+S to save and then
click done, and everything reverts back to 96px wide.
One can only presume this is a bug or I don't know something.
Do these things need to be set programmatic