Archaic wrote:
On Sun, Sep 11, 2005 at 04:09:06PM -1000, Erik Glyttov wrote:
In the Preface, the Structure section includes "making a partition"
under Part II - Preparing for the Build. However, looking at the Table
of Contents, "Preparing a New Partition" currently (and mistakenly?)
falls under Part I - Introduction.
Ahh, very good eye! This leaves me wondering. It would seem more logical
to move it to Part 2, but that also makes for a vrey small Part I.
True. Looking in the LFS Museum, I see that sections like "About $LFS"
and "About SBUs" once came under a second chapter in Part I. Not
suggesting that they be moved back, just pointing out why it might seem
like Part I has gotten smaller.
It *does* seem more logical, though, to have the partition preparation
be under Part II. I don't necessarily think that Part I needs to be that
long, actually. It's described in Structure as containing "a few
important notes" and "meta-information about the book," neither of which
suggests chapters and chapters of text. I'd say update the ToC to match
what Structure says re: "Preparing a New Partition," and not worry about
Part I's length. Just my opinion, subject to change by whim or
convincing arguments. :)
In section 1.1, How to Build an LFS System, the following sounds (at
least to my ears) grammatically odd: "While this may initially seem like
a lot of work to isolate the new system from the host distribution, a
full technical explanation is provided at the beginning of Chapter 5."
I'd suggest something along the lines of "This may initially seem like a
lot of work to isolate the new system from the host distribution; a full
technical explanation is provided at the beginning of Chapter 5."
The first clause begins a long prepositional phrase. The comma is
correct. However, other wording considerations are welcome.
I think I should have been more careful in choosing my words. I
recognize the grammatical "correctness" of the sentence, prepositional
phrase and all, but it just sounds as though something is missing where
the comma now sits. That is, to me, the relationship between the two
clauses isn't as direct as the comma would suggest. Removing the "While"
and separating the clauses a little more sharply with the semicolon
makes it all sound a bit better, to my ears.
Another way to word it might be the following:
While this may initially seem like a lot of work to isolate the new
system from the host distribution, there are reasons why the build
method has been designed in the way that it has. A full technical
explanation is provided at the beginning of Chapter 5.
Erik
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