These were cute. Becky
From: steve doyle Sent: Sunday, November 22, 2009 8:19 AM To: [email protected] Subject: [RecipesAndMore] \FUNNY THINGS KIDS SAY \FUNNY THINGS KIDS SAY This first story is from our church, Immanuel Lutheran of Avilla, Indiana. Recently the Rev. Thomas Dunbar focused on the word "amazing" during his children's sermon (because Jesus "amazed" onlookers with his miracles). When he asked the children if they knew what "amazing" means there was silence. Then one child offered: "A maze is when you get lost in the corn." (In this area corn mazes are popular at this time of year.) So Pastor Dunbar told the children how an "amazing" event was when men landed on the moon. One child then asked, "Why?" John's daughter was about 4 (she is now 36) when he and his late wife, who was an interior decorator, took her for a walk. A woman came from the opposite direction walking a beautiful Irish Setter. "Oh, Mommy, look at the pretty dog!" John's daughter said. "But do they only come in rust?" -- John Collins of Riverside, Rhode Island Julia, 3, sits and plays with her sticker book or her church dolls while the congregation stands and sings hymns. At the conclusion of the hymn, the pastor says, "Please be seated." Julia's immediate stage whisper response is "I AM seated." -- DonnaMoller (Grammy) of Katy, Texas Here are more stories from Donna. Julia, 3, was watching HGTV with Grammy when an advertisement came on for a new show. Grammy was surprised to hear Julia say the burly man had a tutu. Then Julia grinned and corrected herself, "I mean he has ataaa-too." (She meant tattoo.) Julia, 3, and her sister Alyssa, 5, were talking to their mother before bedtime when the topic turned to marriage. Both girls said they wanted to marry Daddy when they grew up. Kathryn, their mother, told them they couldn't marry Daddy because he was already married to her. The girls began crying and repeated their wish to marry Daddy. Through their sobs Kathryn said, "God already has a husband picked out for each of you." Alyssa replied firmly, "I hope he's not that red-headed boy from Vacation Bible School!" When Donna's daughter Kathryn (Alyssa's and Julia's mother) was in kindergarten, much to Donna's surprise her entire class was paired up into boyfriends and girlfriends. Kathryn's boyfriend was blond-haired Adam. One day Kathryn announced, "Adam kissed me today." Donna wondered how serious this was (a kiss on the lips or a peck on the cheek?) so she said, "Where did Adam kiss you?" Kathryn smiled shyly and said, "Behind the television set." Amy's sister, Holly, was lamenting on getting old as she faces her 20th class reunion. Her 5-year old, Rosie, didn't help when she asked her mom, "What did you use before toothbrushes were invented?" -- Aunt Amy of Butler, Pennsylvania D.J. was getting Noah, 4, ready for bed one night. It was about a week after they had visited D.J.'s grandfather in Ohio who was on oxygen, and had the rubber tubes around his face and up his nose. D.J. told Noah that he needed to blow his nose before going to bed because he had some sniffles. He refused. When D.J. asked him how he would clear his nose he replied, "I'll just get one of those snot sucker things like Grandpa has!" -- D.J. Fett of Fort Wayne, Indiana Timmy, 3, met his Aunt Debbie from Texas for the first time. She handed him a gift and Timmy said, "Thank you." Aunt Debbie replied, "My pleasure." Timmy looked up at his grandmother and asked, "Why did her say blood pressure?" -- Timmy's "Gram" Artie Tyrrell of Colonial Beach, Virginia Natalie, 6, was being tucked into bed and had just said her traditional nighttime prayers when her daddy asked her if she'd learned any new prayers in kindergarten at St. Mary's School in Avilla. "Only the flag prayer," she said. "You know, I pledge allegiance, to the flag..." -- Matt Getts of Kendallville, Indiana When Chris and Sean were 3 and 2 they visited their grandparents in San Francisco. One day their grandfather took them for a drive to see the city. Chris asked his grandfather where they were going and he said, "We're going to see the sights, Chris." Chris was quiet for a minute and then asked very seriously, "Pa, do sights bite?" --Maggie Cron (mother of Chris and Sean who are now 40 and 39) of Auburn, Indiana Here is another story from Maggie. When the boys were about the same age they went to a seafood restaurant that was known for its delicious hush puppies. On the way to the restaurant Maggie was telling the boys about the hush puppies and how much they would like them. Suddenly Sean gently patted Maggie's arm and whispered, "Mommy, are hush puppies made from dead puppies?" One day on the way home from St. John Lutheran School Victoria was talking about what she had learned in third grade that day. She was talking about being drug free and reading the pamphlets that were sent home with her. Then she said, "Mom, I'm going to give you a word and I want you to tell me 'X' if it's bad for you or 'circle' if it's good for you." Her mom thought that would be easy, no problem. Victoria's first words were "cigarettes, smoke" and her mom replied "X." Then she said "milk" and her mom said "circle." The next one was "basketball" and her mom said "circle." Then Victoria said "wine made with alcohol" to which her mom quickly replied "X." There was a long pause and Victoria's mother was waiting for another word, however, Victoria replied, "Mom, Jesus made wine and he drank it." Her mother was speechless. She hadn't seen that one coming! --Heather Antal (mother of Victoria) of Topeka, Indiana When Ave went shopping with Melina, 4, she asked if she could have the shopping list to help cross things off. Ave said, "Mommy's list is in her head." Melina replied, "What did you do, eat it?" --Amy (friend of Ave) in Butler, Pennsylvania When Ruby, 3, finally achieved being potty trained, her Daddy said to her, "Wow, Ruby, are you a big girl now?" She replied, "Yeah, but I don't know how to climb ladders yet!" "I love those weird random things kids say and thought you could use this," writes Kathi Fulk (grandmother of Ruby) of Portland, Oregon. Brenda has three children. When her sons, now 35 and 37, were 4 and 6, Danny was learning compound words at school. Danny came home one day and shared with Andy some of his new words like firetruck and bathtub, and what they meant. Then Andy said, "Oh yeah? Then what does brainwashed mean?" They both thought about that for a few minutes and then one of them said, "I guess that is when they hold your head under water for a long, long time." --Brenda Beeman of Meadow, Texas When Brenda's daughter Talitha was very young some asked her what she wanted to be when she grew up. She answered, "I'm a doctor." When asked how she knew that, she stated that Mommy told her. It took her mother some time to figure she'd heard her mother say, "She's adopted." Talitha has now gone to heaven. She would be 26 this year. She died at 16. Josh, 5, was devastated that he missed the cut off date for attending kindergarten. He told his grandmother, Gale, "Don't they know that I want to be smarter than anyone in the universe? I already know how to count to 13 -- now I have to start all over. Do you think if I stand on my tiptoes I'll be big enough?" "No, you have to be old enough," his grandmother said. Josh continued, "If I stand on my tiptoes will I be big enough to go hunting with Daddy?" -- Gale Spence of Angola, Indiana When "Mamie" boarded the plane with Reed, 6, the pilots invited Reed into the cockpit to look around. Mamie thought he understood the pilots were "driving" the plane, but he had no idea. When they got to their seats Reed said, "Mamie, those guys got here very early and got the best seats!" -- KC Schneider ("Mamie") ofLewisville, Texas Here is another one from KC, from a number of years ago. After hearing "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy" all day long from her five little boys, KC said, "I am changing my name from Mommy and I'm not telling anyone my new name." Hours later, when KC tucked her sons into bed, "R.C." (age 4) was crying in his bed. KC said, "Honey, what's wrong?" He said, "I don't know what to call you. Please tell me your new name. I promise not to tell my brothers." R.C. is now 29. And another one from KC. One day while they were shopping for a wedding card at Target, her son Blake, 6, was frantically opening up cards and putting them back in the wrong place. KC rushed over and said, "Stop that. What are you doing?" He said, "I'm looking for the birthday cards with the money in them, like Grandma sends me!" Blake is now 27. And another from KC. Brent, 5, came running into the room screaming, "Help, I got electrocuted." He had gotten a shock when he tried to turn on a lamp. KC said, "You'll be OK. If you had gotten electrocuted you would have died." He thought for a second and said, "Well, I got a Littlecuted." Alex, 7, has a best friend named Will. Alex spent the night with MamaRuthie and Daddy Bob a few weeks ago and while he was there he told them that he and Will have decided to go to the same college. When asked where they were going he told them they were going to Ole Miss. MamaRuthie asked him if he was going there because it is a family tradition and she had gone there and his daddy, John, had, too. He said, "No, we are going there because we heard it is a PARTY SCHOOL!" -- Ruthie Garvin of Humboldt, Tennessee Max, 2, kept taking toys away from his older cousin, Mitchell, 4. Each time Max would grab a toy, Mitchell would whine. Mitchell's mom kept saying to him, "Mitchell, let Max play with that, he is a baby." Upon hearing that a few times, Max took another toy away from Mitchell. Mitchell started to whine. Max replied "Mine! Me baby." -- Carrie Harris of Portage, Michigan -- Access the Recipes And More list archives at: http://www.mail-archive.com/recipesandmore%40googlegroups.com/ Visit the group home page at: http://groups.google.com/group/RecipesAndMore -- Access the Recipes And More list archives at: http://www.mail-archive.com/recipesandmore%40googlegroups.com/ Visit the group home page at: http://groups.google.com/group/RecipesAndMore
