Where I go to work, a quote stands etched in a very large font into the
concrete prominently to remind us to be humble.

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the
illusion of knowledge.
(Daniel J. Boorstin)

You just have to trust us on this. We are not jumping to conclusions
based on one or two silly posts. It was evident in almost *every* post
you posted so far. *You really are a newbie* and there is nothing wrong
with that. We all have been there. But you must stop being defensive
about it. You just need to be patient and read all the docs before
trying to do what you are trying to do now.

Here is a link to keep you busy.
http://www.awaretek.com/tutorials.html

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