Hi Adrian,

Thanks for approving the changes. The revision has been published.

Best regards,
Young

From: Adrian Farrel [mailto:[email protected]]
Sent: Wednesday, December 5, 2018 12:10 PM
To: Leeyoung <[email protected]>; [email protected]
Cc: [email protected]; 'Dhruv Dhody' 
<[email protected]>; 'Daniele Ceccarelli' <[email protected]>
Subject: RE: Review of draft-ietf-pce-applicability-actn

Young,

Thanks for a very speedy response.

Looks like you captured all of my comments. Please post.

Then we can pursue the chairs for WG last call 😊

Cheers,
Adrian

From: Leeyoung <[email protected]<mailto:[email protected]>>
Sent: 05 December 2018 17:14
To: [email protected]<mailto:[email protected]>; 
[email protected]<mailto:[email protected]>
Cc: 
[email protected]<mailto:[email protected]>;
 Dhruv Dhody <[email protected]<mailto:[email protected]>>; Daniele 
Ceccarelli 
<[email protected]<mailto:[email protected]>>
Subject: RE: Review of draft-ietf-pce-applicability-actn

Hi Adrian,

Thanks for your comments. Please see inline for our response to your comment.

Please also see the attached diff file that compares the old version with new 
version. If you approve, we will upload the revision.

Thanks.
Young & Dhruv & Daniele

From: Adrian Farrel [mailto:[email protected]]
Sent: Monday, December 3, 2018 4:32 PM
To: [email protected]<mailto:[email protected]>
Cc: 
[email protected]<mailto:[email protected]>
Subject: Review of draft-ietf-pce-applicability-actn

Hi all,

It seems like draft-ietf-pce-applicability-actn is probably approaching ready 
to go forward, so I did a review. The document looks to be in pretty good 
shape: I found a list of nits (below), but with these fixed I think the draft 
would be ready for last call.

Thanks,
Adrian
--
It's Christmas.
Buy someone you love a book of fairy tales.
https://www.feedaread.com/profiles/8604/
Available from your favourite online bookseller.
Or contact me to receive a signed copy by mail.

======
Abstract

I would replace the second paragraph with something about PCE, as well
as about PCEP. That is, the document is about the applicability to PCE
to ACTN, as well as the applicability of PCEP to ACTN.

Something like...

   The Path Computation Element (PCE) is component, application, or
   network node that is capable of computing a network path or route
   based on a network graph and applying computational constraints.  The
   PCE serves requests from Path Computation Clients (PCCs) that
   communicate with it over a local API or using the Path Computation
   Element Communication Protocol (PCEP).

---

YL>> Agreed with the suggested abstract.


Introduction

First paragraph is a bit jumbled.

OLD
   The Path Computation Element Communication Protocol (PCEP) [RFC5440]
   provides mechanisms for Path Computation Elements (PCEs) [RFC4655] to
   perform path computations in response to Path Computation Clients
   (PCCs) requests.
NEW
   The Path Computation Element Communication Protocol (PCEP) [RFC5440]
   provides mechanisms for Path Computation Clients (PCCs) to request a
   Path Computation Element (PCEs) [RFC4655] to perform path
   computations.
END

YL>> Accepted.
---

1.1 para 3
s/computed paths,/computed paths)/

---

YL>> Done.

1.1.2 and onwards...
Can you tidy up the capitalisation of the section headings?

---

YL>> Yes, captalization was done for all section headings.

1.1.2

s/environments require/environments requires/

---

YL>> Corrected.

1.1.2

s/Backward recursive/Backward Recursive/

---

YL>> Corrected.

1.1.2

   However, both per-domain and BRPC techniques
   assume that the sequence of domains to be crossed from source to
   destination is known, either fixed by the network operator or
   obtained by other means.

I don't think this is right. Of course, BRPC can work best with a
known domain sequence, but it will also work nicely with a small set of
interconnected domains. What it doesn't work well for is a large set of
interconnected domains (but note that is "doesn't work well" rather than
"doesn't work").

YL>> How about the following:

Old: However, both per-domain and BRPC techniques
   assume that the sequence of domains to be crossed from source to
   destination is known, either fixed by the network operator or
   obtained by other means.

NEW: However, per-domain technique
   assumes that the sequence of domains to be crossed from source to
   destination is known, either fixed by the network operator or
   obtained by other means. BRPC can work best with a known domain
   sequence, and it will also work nicely with a small set of interconnected 
domains.
   However, it doesn't work well for is a large set of interconnected domains.
---

1.1.3

s/an hierarchy/a hierarchy/

---

YL>> Corrected.

1.2

I think it would be best to not include a reference to
[I-D.ietf-teas-actn-requirements] because that document has almost
certainly been abandoned. How about...

OLD
   [I-D.ietf-teas-actn-requirements] describes the high-level ACTN
   requirements.  [RFC8453] describes the architecture model for ACTN
   including the entities (Customer Network Controller(CNC), Multi-
   domain Service Coordinator(MDSC), and Provisioning Network Controller
   (PNC) and their interfaces.
NEW
   [RFC8453] describes the high-level ACTN requirements and the
   architecture model for ACTN including the following entities:
   Customer Network Controller (CNC), Multi-domain Service Coordinator
   (MDSC), and Provisioning Network Controller (PNC) and their
   interfaces.
END

---

YL>> Agreed.

1.2 Just a little clarity of text.

OLD
   The two interfaces with respect to the MDSC, one north of the MDSC
   (CMI CNC-MDSC Interface) and one south (MPI MDSC-PNC Interface).  A
   hierarchy of MDSC is possible with a recursive MPI interface.
NEW
   There are two interfaces with respect to the MDSC: one north of the
   MDSC (the CNC-MDSC Interface : CMI), and one south (the MDSC-PNC
   Interface : MPI).  A hierarchy of MDSCs is possible with a recursive
   MPI interface.
END

YL>> Agreed.

---

Section 2

A little of the confusion between PCE and PCEP here.

How about...

OLD
   It should be noted that, this document lists all possible ways in
   which PCEP could be used for each of the above functions, but all
   functions are not required to be implemented via PCEP.  Operator may
   choose to use the PCEP for multi domain coordination via stateful
   H-PCE but use RESTCONF [RFC8040] or BGP-LS [RFC7752] to get the
   topology and support abstraction function.
NEW
   It should be noted that, this document lists all possible ways in
   which a PCE could be used for each of the above functions, but not
   all functions are required to be implemented using a PCE.  Similarly,
   this document presents the ways in which PCEP could be used as the
   communications medium between funcitonl components.  Operators may
   choose to use PCEP for multi domain coordination via a stateful
   H-PCE, but use RESTCONF [RFC8040] or BGP-LS [RFC7752] to get access
   to the topology and the support abstraction function.
END

YL>> Accepted with adding a word “alternatively” in the last sentence between 
“but” and “use”.
---

2.1

OLD
[I-D.litkowski-pce-state-sync]" describes
NEW
[I-D.litkowski-pce-state-sync] describes
END

YL>> Corrected.
---

2.1
Please expand E2E on first use.

YL>> OK. Done.
---

2.2

s/This also include/This also includes the/

YL>> Done.
---

2.2

s/another approaches/another approach/

YL>. Done.
---

2.3
s/In which case after parent PCE/In which case, after the parent PCE/

YL>. Done.
---

2.3
Please expand LSR on first use

YL>> Expanded to Label Switching Router
---

3.
s/The Section 4 describe how/Section 4 describes how/

YL>> Correct.
---

Section 3 has, "The two ACTN interfaces are", but this is followed by
three bullet points. I think that the third one is supposed to be
ordinary indented paragraph text.

YL>> Yes, corrected.
---

Section 4

      *  Topology Change: When the PNC learns of any topology change,
         the PNC needs to decide if the change needs to be notified to
         the MDSC.  This is dependent on the level of abstraction
         between the MDSC and the PNC.

I'd add to that something about thresholding changes as well.

YL>> Reporting thresholding changes would be a good capability; however, this 
require additional enhancement to PCEP or other mechanisms.
---

4.
s/the resulted E2E/the resultant E2E/

YL>> Changed.
---

Maybe use more common text in Seciton 5. Such as...

   This document makes no requests for IANA action.

---

Section 6 uses upper case RECOMMENDED. Maybe...

OLD
   When PCEP is used on the MPI, this interface needs to be secured, use
   of [RFC8253] is RECOMENDED.
NEW
   When PCEP is used on the MPI, this interface needs to be secured.
   That can be achieved using the procedures described in [RFC8253].
END

YL>> Agreed and done.
---

I think 4655 might be a normative reference.

YL>> OK. Moved to the normative reference section.

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