Dear Authors/Chairs/ADs, Please see below for feedback from the experts.
Best regards, David Dong IANA Services Sr. Specialist On Wed May 08 09:42:59 2024, pait...@ciena.com wrote: > > * 1.1 > > Add "the": > > Section 3 addresses these issues. Also, the ipv6ExtensionHeaders > IPFIX > IE is deprecated in favor of the new IEs defined in this document. > > > * 1.2 > > Add "the" : > > The specification of the tcpOptions IPFIX IE (209) does not: > > Should "option" be "options"? : > > * Describe how some observed TCP options in a Flow can be exported > using IPFIX. Only TCP options having a Kind <= 63 can be exported > in a tcpOptions IE. > > Add "the" : > > Section 4 addresses these issues. Also, the tcpOptions IE is > deprecated > in favor of the new IEs defined in this document. > > > * 2 > > Is the indentation correct here? : > > Extension header chain: Refers to the chain of extension headers > that are present in an IPv6 packet. > > This term should not be confused with the IPv6 header chain, which > includes the IPv6 header, zero or more IPv6 extension headers, and > zero or a single Upper-Layer Header. > > > * 3.2 > > "the same" : > > Description: The number of consecutive occurrences of the same > extension header type in a Flow. > > > * 3.4 > > Add "ipv6ExtensionHeaderTypeCountList" : > > If several extension header chains are observed in a Flow, each > header chain MUST be exported in a separate > ipv6ExtensionHeaderTypeCountList IE. > > > * 3.5 > > What if both ipv6ExtensionHeadersFull and > ipv6ExtensionHeaderTypeCountList are exported? > [Later] this is discussed in section 5.1, but that wouldn't be known > from reading the IPFIX registry alone. The fact that these IEs are > mutually exclusive should be added to both IE descriptions. > > > Description: When set to "false", this Information Element indicates > that the exported extension headers information (e.g., > ipv6ExtensionHeadersFull or ipv6ExtensionHeaderTypeCountList) does > not match the full enclosed extension headers > > > * 3.6 > > Change "identifying" to "to identify" : > > Exporting such information might help > to identify root causes of performance degradation, including > packet drops. > > How would we know which ipv6ExtensionHeadersChainLength IE corresponds > with which header chain? > > If several extension header chains are observed in a Flow, each > header chain length MUST be exported in a separate > ipv6ExtensionHeadersChainLength IE. > > > * 5.1 > > "Will" sounds like a detail of a particular implementation. More > generally this should be a "MUST", a "SHOULD", or a "MAY": > > If an implementation determines that an observed packet of a Flow > includes an extension header that it does not support, then the exact > observed code of that extension header will be echoed in the > ipv6ExtensionHeaderTypeCountList IE (Section 3.4). > > > * 5.2 > > What does this mean? : > > If a TCP Flow contains packets with a mix of 2-byte and 4-byte > Experiment IDs, the same Template Record is used with both > tcpSharedOptionExID16 and tcpSharedOptionExID32 IEs. > > > > * 6.1 > > It would be helpful to list the corresponding header bit values, and > to list them in order (0, 1, 5) rather than 1, 5, 0: > > > Figure 1 provides an example of reported values in an > ipv6ExtensionHeadersFull IE for an IPv6 Flow in which only the IPv6 > Destination Options header (0) is observed. > > > Figure 2 provides another example of reported values in an > ipv6ExtensionHeadersFull IE for an IPv6 Flow in which the IPv6 Hop- > by-Hop Options (1), Routing (5), and Destination Options (0) headers > are > observed. > > > * 6.2 > > It would be helpful to list the corresponding header bit values: > > Figure 3 shows an example of reported values in a tcpOptionsFull IE > for a TCP Flow in which End of Option List (0), Maximum Segment Size > (2), and > Window Scale (3) options are observed. > > Please use the full 16-bit value, "0348" : > > 1. The tcpSharedOptionExID16 IE set to 0x0348454E to report observed > 2-byte ExIDs: HOST_ID and TCP-ENO ExIDs. > > > * 8.1 > > It's unclear which IE "this IE" is. eg, write "IE 209" if that's > what's meant. > > > * Update the tcpOptions IE (209) entry by marking it as deprecated > in favor of the tcpOptionsFull IE defined in this document. This > note should also be echoed in the "Additional Information" of this > IE. > > > * 8.4 > > This section sets up a potential conflict: what would happen if a new > code was assigned to an IPv6 EH in [IANA-EH], but the expert reviewers > disagreed with adding it to IPFIX? > > Section 1.1 said, "how to automatically update the IANA IPFIX > registry". Is expert review contrary to an automatic update? > > > > * 8.4.1. > > Typo in Initial Values: > > +-----+-------+----------+-------------------------+---------------+ > | 1 | HOP | 0 | Pv6 Hop-by-Hop Options | This-Document | > +-----+-------+----------+-------------------------+---------------+ > > _______________________________________________ OPSAWG mailing list -- opsawg@ietf.org To unsubscribe send an email to opsawg-le...@ietf.org
