Something is looking for 
'/opt/local/libexec/macports/lib/sqlite3.44.2/libsqlite3.44.2.dylib’ , but that 
looks like a hardcoded path, because I’m not installing into /opt/local.  That 
dylib is present in /opt/ports.

From the backtrace, it's Pextlib. Confirm with `otool -L /opt/ports/libexec/macports/lib/pextlib1.0/Pextlib.dylib`.

A recursive grep for /opt/local in the build directory should show where it's being added (ignore configure.ac). Had you configured this directory for the default prefix previously? If so, did you make clean before configuring for the new prefix?

- Josh

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