Thanks Tommy for the detailed review. Proposed changes look good to me. Cheers, -Tiru
On Wed, 10 Aug 2022 at 22:03, Tommy Pauly <tpauly=40apple....@dmarc.ietf.org> wrote: > I’ve done a review pass of this document. In general, I think it is > technically good. > > I did find several places where I think additional clarity or editorial > improvements could be made. To address these, I’ve proposed the following > pull request: > https://github.com/boucadair/draft-ietf-ipsecme-add-ike/pull/5 > > Some of the revenant items I am trying to address are: > - Make it more clear early on that the attributes are generically > communicating encrypted DNS resolvers, and don’t define specific details > for DoH/DoT/DoQ (that comes from the SVCB-DNS draft) > - Be more explicit about how ENCDNS_IP* are two specific types, ENCDNS_IP4 > and ENCDNS_IP6 > - Introduce and explain ENCDNS_DIGEST_INFO earlier on. Currently, it is > defined with no explanation until a later section. > - Clarify the behavior of the initiator for including ENCDNS_IP* > attributes. Specifically, I believe this is intended to be: either include > exactly one empty ENCDNS_IP* attribute of a given type to request “any” > encrypted DNS resolver on that address family; OR, include one or more of > that type with hints about the addresses and APNs being requested. This was > implied by the text previously, but not clear. > > If these items are addressed, I’m happy to see this progress. > > Thanks, > Tommy > > On Aug 9, 2022, at 1:47 PM, Tero Kivinen <kivi...@iki.fi> wrote: > > This is the start of 2 week WGLC on the document, ending 2022-08-17. > Please submit your comments to the list, also send a note if you have > reviewed the document, so we can see how many people are interested in > getting this out. > -- > kivi...@iki.fi > > _______________________________________________ > IPsec mailing list > IPsec@ietf.org > https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/ipsec > > > _______________________________________________ > IPsec mailing list > IPsec@ietf.org > https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/ipsec >
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