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Watch Extreme Videos Around the World iklan-mini
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Jokes of the day
Seems a guy was driving for hours thu desolate country when he passed a farmhouse, and before he could react, a cat ran out in front of him and splat... he flattened the cat. Out of kindness and consideration, he stopped, turned around and drove back to the farmhouse to notify the occupants. When the housewife came to the door, said he, Pardon me madame, but I just ran over a cat in front of your house, and assumed that it must belong to you. I know this might be hard to hear, but Iwanted to let you know instead of just driving off....
Not so fast, says she. How do you know it was our cat? Could you describe him? What does he look like?
The man promptly flopped down on the ground, and said He looks like this as he gave his best shot at a dead cat impression.
Oh no, you horrible man, she replied. I meant, what did he look like before you hit him?
At that, the man got up, covered his eyes with both hands and screamed Agh!
Joke 2
How are you doing?
A lone tourist who is passing through the suburbs on the way to town by car, unfortunately experiences mechanical problems with the automobile. The car stalls and the tourist parks the car by the side of the road and waits for help.
Not much later, a farmer happens to pass by with a truck full of farm animals. The farmer offers the tourist a lift to town and proceeds to explain that he is bringing his farm animals to the town market, where they will be auctioned off to the highest bidders.
Well, it so happens that on the way to the town, the farmer being so engrossed in his story, unintentionally wanders into the other side of road where another vehicle is approaching in the other direction.
The farmer realizes his absent mindness and attempts to avoid the possible collision with the other vehicle. He just misses the other car, but unfortunately crashes the truck into the side of the road. The tourist winds up thrown into a ditch and suffers broken ribs and a broken arm and leg and is obviously in extreme pain. The farm animals are all messed up very badly and the farmer, although remaining inside the vehicle, still suffers cuts and scrapes.
The farmer gets out of the truck and looks at his farm animals.
The chickens all have broken limbs and can barely move. These chickens are all useless! Nobody will want to buy these chickens anymore! bellows the farmer. With that, he grabs and loads his shotgun and blows away the chickens.
Next, he sees the pigs and they are all lame and bleeding profusely. These pigs are all worthless now! I'll get nothing for them! yells the farmer. With great rage, the farmer reloads his shotgun and blows away the pigs.
The farmer looks at the sheep and they all have broken limbs and their wool is all bloodied. Worthless sheep! screams the farmer and with that, he reloads his shotgun and blows away the sheep.
Meanwhile, the injured tourist witnesses all of this carnage in great horror.
The farmer then moves over to the side of the ditch and looks at the tourist. Are you okay down there? asked the farmer.
Never felt better in my entire life ! the tourist yelled back.
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