Hello Aphrodisiacs,
Time really passes by or I must be very busy. What ever the reasons it does
not matter. Ii was just me being lazy to send the weekly come monthly come
bi-monthly come once in a blue moon email.
I hope you are happy, healthy and wealthy than before. I have been doing
great and Aphrodite is doing really good. Thanks to you and your friends. Lot of
events coming up in Aphrodite. To start with, this Saturday, May
20, from 2 pm, we would have some of the finest Expat and ladies pool
players competing each other at the lobby area. Its free entrance and
yes, you are welcome.
Sunday May 21, if you are in Jakarta, you and your family are
welcome to come to the small little FPI (PFS) / Aphrodite booth for
some complimentary drinks as part of our 5th Anniversary party (part 2). There
will be 5 parts of party all together.
I am also planning for a trip to Bali (Aphrodite anniversary party
Part 3). Support Bali trip. I want to get about 150 of Aphrodite
people, chatter a plane, stay in one hotel with good program for 3 days and 2
nights, starting with a campfire on the 2nd night's party. Will keep you
informed. It could turn out to be a Hugh event. I am hoping for an Airline
company and a hotel in Bali to give us a good deal. Also I am looking for other
sponsors. If interested, please email me or contact me at +62811955124.
World Cup! Yes, we will be showing it at all cost. Will give you more
information on that in the next email.To prepare for the world cup, below I
got a message for wives and girlfriends...... hehe. As a test run, last night we
showed the Champions League and had a good turn out of about 50 people. So I
think the world cup will be good.
Not enough time as I am doing this Thursday night/ Friday morning at
1.30. So I will keep it short.
SPORTS this weekend
Rugby:
Super 14 Semi Finals - Friday Super 14:: SF 1: Hurricanes vs
Waratahs, LIVE at 2 pm & Saturday Super 14:: SF 2:
Crusaders vs Vodacom Bulls, LIVE at 2 pm.
Vadacom Cup Finals - Saturday 6.45 pm Vodacom Cup:: Final:
Medicover Valke vs Natal Wildebeest, LIVE
Heineken Cup Finals - Saturday 9 pm Heineken:: Final: Biarritz V
Munster, LIVE
JOKES
Contributed by Ken Allan
WORLD CUP RULES
FOR: WIVES, PARTNERS & GIRLFRIENDS.
Dear Wife, Partner or Girlfriend
1. From 9 June to 9 July 2006, you should read the sports section of the newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention.
2. During the World Cup, the television is mine, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will lose it (your eye).
3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don't mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without any distractions. If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put your clothes on right after because if you catch a cold, I won't have time to take you to the doctor or look after you during the World Cup month.
4. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require a refill of my drink or something to eat. You are out of your mind if you expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up the baby that just fell on the floor....It won't happen.
5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and please do not make any funny faces at my friends when they come over to watch the games. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV between 12am and 6am, unless they replay a good game that I missed during the day.
6. Please, please, please!! If you see me upset because one of my teams is losing, DO NOT say "get over it, That's only a game", or "don't worry, they'll win next time". If you say these things, you will only make me more upset and I will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about football than me and your so called "words of encouragement" will only lead to a break up or divorce.
7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to me during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the half time scores is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying "one"
game; hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to "spend time together".
8. The replays of the goals are very important. I don't care if I have seen them or I haven't seen them, I want to see them again. Many times.
9. Tell your friends NOT to have any babies, or any other child related parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because:
a) I will not go,
b) I will not go, and
c) I will not go.
10. But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a game, we will be there in a flash.
11. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying "but you have already seen this...why don't you change the channel to something we can all watch?" because, the reply will be, "Refer to Rule #2 of this list".
12. And finally, please save your expressions such as "Thank God the World Cup is only every 4 years". I am immune to these words, because after this comes the Champions League, Italian League, Spanish League, Premier League, FA Cup, etc.
Thank you for your cooperation.
FOR: WIVES, PARTNERS & GIRLFRIENDS.
Dear Wife, Partner or Girlfriend
1. From 9 June to 9 July 2006, you should read the sports section of the newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention.
2. During the World Cup, the television is mine, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will lose it (your eye).
3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don't mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without any distractions. If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put your clothes on right after because if you catch a cold, I won't have time to take you to the doctor or look after you during the World Cup month.
4. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require a refill of my drink or something to eat. You are out of your mind if you expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up the baby that just fell on the floor....It won't happen.
5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and please do not make any funny faces at my friends when they come over to watch the games. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV between 12am and 6am, unless they replay a good game that I missed during the day.
6. Please, please, please!! If you see me upset because one of my teams is losing, DO NOT say "get over it, That's only a game", or "don't worry, they'll win next time". If you say these things, you will only make me more upset and I will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about football than me and your so called "words of encouragement" will only lead to a break up or divorce.
7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to me during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the half time scores is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying "one"
game; hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to "spend time together".
8. The replays of the goals are very important. I don't care if I have seen them or I haven't seen them, I want to see them again. Many times.
9. Tell your friends NOT to have any babies, or any other child related parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because:
a) I will not go,
b) I will not go, and
c) I will not go.
10. But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a game, we will be there in a flash.
11. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying "but you have already seen this...why don't you change the channel to something we can all watch?" because, the reply will be, "Refer to Rule #2 of this list".
12. And finally, please save your expressions such as "Thank God the World Cup is only every 4 years". I am immune to these words, because after this comes the Champions League, Italian League, Spanish League, Premier League, FA Cup, etc.
Thank you for your cooperation.
*****************************************
Contributed by Mathew Ninan
A guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to
the
counter and says, "Hi... You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really
rather have a job."
The social worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is excellent. We
just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur
and bodyguard for his beautiful nymphomaniac daughter. You'll have to drive
around in his Mercedes, but he'll supply all of your clothes. Because of
the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort her on
her overseas holiday trips. You will have to satisfy her sexual urges.
You'll be provided a two-bedroom apartment above the garage. The starting
salary is $200,000 a year."
The guy, wide-eyed, says, "You're bullshittin' me!"
The social worker says, "Yeah, well... you started it."
counter and says, "Hi... You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really
rather have a job."
The social worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is excellent. We
just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur
and bodyguard for his beautiful nymphomaniac daughter. You'll have to drive
around in his Mercedes, but he'll supply all of your clothes. Because of
the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort her on
her overseas holiday trips. You will have to satisfy her sexual urges.
You'll be provided a two-bedroom apartment above the garage. The starting
salary is $200,000 a year."
The guy, wide-eyed, says, "You're bullshittin' me!"
The social worker says, "Yeah, well... you started it."
************************************************
Contributed by Stephen Barber (Aussie)
An Australian ventriloquist in NZ
An Australian ventriloquist visiting New Zealand, walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog.
He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Kiwi "G'day, mind if I talk to your dog?"
Villager: "The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Aussie."
Ventriloquist: "Hello dog, how's it going mate?"
Dog: "Doin' all right."
Kiwi: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: "Is this villager your owner?" (pointing at the villager)
Dog: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Kiwi: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Kiwi: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either....I think."
Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Cool"
Kiwi: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (pointing at the villager)
Horse: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."
Kiwi: (total look of amazement)
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"
Kiwi: (in a panic) "The sheep's a liar."
***********************************************
Take care of you and have a great weekend.
Fred
Aphrodite at Klub Rasuna
Jl.H.R.Rasuna Said, Kav C - 22, Jakarta 12920
Tel: 527-3307 Fax: 526-3265 Hp: 0811-955124
(Turn left after R.S.MMC)
Jl.H.R.Rasuna Said, Kav C - 22, Jakarta 12920
Tel: 527-3307 Fax: 526-3265 Hp: 0811-955124
(Turn left after R.S.MMC)
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