Hi Paul, Thanks for the review and comments. Version -07 has been uploaded to address your comments. Detailed answers below.
Thanks, Yingzhen On Mon, May 27, 2024 at 10:51 AM Paul Kyzivat <pkyzi...@alum.mit.edu> wrote: > I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area > Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed > by the IESG for the IETF Chair. Please treat these comments just > like any other last call comments. > > For more information, please see the FAQ at > > <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>. > > Document: draft-ietf-mpls-msd-yang-05 > Reviewer: Paul Kyzivat > Review Date: 2024-05-27 > IETF LC End Date: 2024-06-04 > IESG Telechat date: ? > > Summary: > > This draft is on the right track but has open issues, described in the > review. > > Disclaimer: > > This reviewer is "YANG challenged". Hence I have not verified the syntax > or semantics of the YANG content. I trust there has been or will be a > separate review by a YANG expert. > > ISSUES: 3 > NITS: 1 > > 1) ISSUE - General > > I find the language in this document to be extremely difficult to > follow. (For instance, see the confusing language cited in the next > issue.) The main problem is that it is formally referencing and defining > terms/entities named using sequences of words and acronyms including > spaces. (This includes YANG entities, IANA registry table names, and the > names of entries in IANA registries.) > > These terms are used in descriptions with nothing to distinguish them > from the surrounding text. Hence it becomes a struggle to parse the > text. I strongly recommend revising the document to syntactically set > off the formal names of the entities being defined and referenced from > the surrounding text. For instance: 'IGP MSD-Types' > > [Yingzhen]: Please see the answer to issue #2. > 2) ISSUE - Confusing language in Section 1 > > I can't parse: "... defines the identities for Maximum SID Depth (MSD) > Types as the IANA the IGP MSD-Types registry." > > I still can't follow it even if I make the change I requested above: > > "... defines the identities for Maximum SID Depth (MSD) Types as the > IANA the 'IGP MSD-Types' registry." > > . I *think* you might mean: > > "... defines the identities for 'Maximum SID Depth (MSD)' Types in the > IANA 'IGP MSD-Types' registry." But I am far from certain of this. > > [Yingzhen]: The first paragraph of section 2.1 has been written and added information about the IANA registry. Hope it's clear now. If more clarification is needed, please kindly let us know. > 3) ISSUE - Possible missing IANA action > > Section 4 defines a YANG module named 'iana-msd-types'. I *think* there > is an intent to add this as a new entry in the IANA registry 'IGP > MSD-Types'. But I don't find anything that does this. (I would expect > something more in IANA Considerations.) > > [Yingzhen]: No, the YANG Model types represent the existing IANA registry without modifying it. 4) NIT > > The document heading shows "Workgroup: Internet" but shouldn't it be the > MPLS WG? > > [Yingzhen]: fixed.
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