I reviewed the v12 and it looks good. Ready for publication.
Thank you Gyan On Thu, Feb 8, 2024 at 9:27 PM Greg Mirsky <gregimir...@gmail.com> wrote: > Hi Gyan, > thank you for your review, comments, and question. Please note that the > new version of the draft includes all the updates listed earlier. I hope > that we've addressed your concerns. > > Name: draft-ietf-detnet-ip-oam > Revision: 12 > Title: Operations, Administration and Maintenance (OAM) for > Deterministic Networks (DetNet) with IP Data Plane > Date: 2024-02-08 > Group: detnet > Pages: 9 > URL: https://www.ietf.org/archive/id/draft-ietf-detnet-ip-oam-12.txt > Status: https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-detnet-ip-oam/ > HTML: https://www.ietf.org/archive/id/draft-ietf-detnet-ip-oam-12.html > HTMLized: https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/html/draft-ietf-detnet-ip-oam > Diff: > https://author-tools.ietf.org/iddiff?url2=draft-ietf-detnet-ip-oam-12 > > Abstract: > > This document discusses the use of existing IP Operations, > Administration, and Maintenance protocols and mechanisms in > Deterministic Networking networks that use the IP data plane. > > Best regards, > Greg > > On Tue, Feb 6, 2024 at 6:30 AM Greg Mirsky <gregimir...@gmail.com> wrote: > >> Hi Gyan, >> thank you for your thorough review, thoughtful question, and helpful >> suggestion. Please find my notes below tagged GIM>>. >> >> Best regards, >> Greg >> >> On Fri, Feb 2, 2024 at 10:31 PM Gyan Mishra via Datatracker < >> nore...@ietf.org> wrote: >> >>> Reviewer: Gyan Mishra >>> Review result: Ready with Nits >>> >>> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area >>> Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed >>> by the IESG for the IETF Chair. Please treat these comments just >>> like any other last call comments. >>> >>> For more information, please see the FAQ at >>> >>> <https://wiki.ietf.org/en/group/gen/GenArtFAQ>. >>> >>> Document: draft-ietf-detnet-ip-oam-?? >>> Reviewer: Gyan Mishra >>> Review Date: 2024-02-02 >>> IETF LC End Date: 2024-02-02 >>> IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat >>> >>> Summary: >>> >>> This document defines the principles for using Operations, >>> Administration, and >>> Maintenance protocols and mechanisms in the Deterministic Networking >>> networks >>> with the IP data plane. >>> >>> The draft is well written and almost ready for publication. >>> >>> Major issues: >>> None >>> >> GIM>> Thank you. >> >>> >>> Minor issues: >>> Should Detnet OAM over IP data plane include IOAM RFC 9378 integrated >>> OAM >>> where the OAM packets are sent in-situ with the data packets. Should >>> OAM DEX >>> postcard based telemetry described in draft below and RFC 9232 Network >>> telemetry framework. >>> >>> https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/html/draft-mb-mpls-ioam-dex-05 >> >> GIM>> IOAM is an example of performance measurement methods (hybrid per >> RFC 7799) using on-path telemetry. As I understand it, only applicability >> of IOAM in IPv6 networks is standardized while the discussion continues as >> part of the MPLS Network Action in the MPLS WG. Also, IETF standardized the >> Alternate Marking Method in RFC 9341 >> <https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/rfc9341/>, and several new proposals >> of interesting on-path telemetry solutions (e.g., HPCC++, CSIG, and Path >> Tracing) have been presented and are discussed. It seems that once we learn >> more about these solutions, and how they can be applied in IP and MPLS >> networks, the applicability of on-path telemetry in DetNet can be described >> in the new document. What are your thoughts? >> >>> >>> >>> Nits/editorial comments: >>> >>> Section 3 last paragraph >>> >>> Most of on-demand failure detection and localization in IP networks is >>> being >>> done by using the Internet Control Message Protocol (ICMP) Echo Request, >>> Echo >>> Reply and the set of defined error messages, e.g., Destination >>> Unreachable, >>> with the more detailed information provided through code points. >>> [RFC0792] and >>> [RFC4443] define the ICMP for IPv4 and IPv6 networks, respectively. >>> Because >>> ICMP is another IP protocol like, for example, UDP, a DetNet node must >>> able to >>> associate an ICMP packet generated by the specified IP DetNet node an >>> addressed >>> to the another IP DetnNet node with an IP DetNet flow between this pair >>> of >>> endpoints. >>> >>> Comment on the last line or above paragraph. >>> >>> Technically IPv4 is protocol 4, IPv6 is protocol 41, UDP protocol 17. >>> So all >>> have different protocol numbers. However ICMP is part of the IP protocol >>> suite >>> for diagnostics and uses the same IP header to forward the packet. >>> >>> New >>> >>> Because ICMP RFC 792 is part of the IP protocol suite and uses a basic IP >>> header, with data portion used for diagnostics, similarly UDP utilizes >>> the IP >>> header as well and is part of the transport layer, thereby facilitating a >>> DETNET node that must be able to associate an ICMP packet generated by >>> the >>> specified IP DetNet node and addressed to the another IP DetnNet node >>> with an >>> IP DetNet flow between this pair of endpoints. >>> >> >> GIM>> Thank you for the suggestion and the proposed update. Would the >> following update address your concern: >> OLD TEXT: >> Because >> ICMP is another IP protocol like, for example, UDP, a DetNet node must >> able to >> associate an ICMP packet generated by the specified IP DetNet node an >> addressed >> to the another IP DetnNet node with an IP DetNet flow between this pair of >> endpoints. >> >> NEW TEXT: >> In order to use ICMP for these purposes with DetNet, DetNet nodes must be >> able >> to associate ICMP traffic between DetNet nodes with IP DetNet traffic, >> e.g., ensure that >> such ICMP traffic uses the DetNet IP data plane in each node, otherwise >> ICMP may >> be unable to detect and localize failures that are specific to the DetNet >> IP data plane. >> >> > -- <http://www.verizon.com/> *Gyan Mishra* *Network Solutions A**rchitect * *Email gyan.s.mis...@verizon.com <gyan.s.mis...@verizon.com>* *M 301 502-1347*
_______________________________________________ Gen-art mailing list Gen-art@ietf.org https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art
