> -----Original Message----- > From: Ben Campbell [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] > Sent: Thursday, October 18, 2007 4:07 PM > To: General Area Review Team; Cullen Jennings; Desineni, Harikishan; > [EMAIL PROTECTED]; [EMAIL PROTECTED]; [EMAIL PROTECTED]; > [EMAIL PROTECTED] > Subject: Gen-ART review of draft-ietf-avt-rtp-evrc-wb-03 > > I have been selected as the General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) > reviewer for this draft (for background on Gen-ART, please see > http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html). > > Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments > you may receive. > > > Document: draft-ietf-avt-rtp-evrc-wb-03 > Reviewer: Ben Campbell > Review Date: 2007-10-18 > IETF LC End Date: 2007-10-22 > > Summary: > > This draft is basically ready for publication, but has nits that > should be fixed before publication. > > Comments: > > I found the draft well written and easy to understand. I only had one > substantive nit; the rest are editorial only: > > Substantive: > > Section 17, 11th example (I think): > > "Example offer answer exchanges for interoperability between legacy > (RFC XXXX) and updated EVRC-B(RFC 4788) implementations:" > > Are the RFC references reversed? RFC XXX is the updated, not the > legacy, version, right?
RFC 4788 is the legacy version. I'll fix this. > > > Editorial: > > Section 1: > > Odd spacing between sentences. Sometime there are no spaces, > sometimes there are two. I did not notice this elsewhere. > OK > Section 3, second paragraph (Personal pet-peeve; feel free to ignore.): > > Constructs like "...defined in [5]." create extra work for the > reader in the form of page flipping. " Things like "defined in <doc- > name> [5]", or "...defined in [mnemonic symbol] " are much more > friendly. > > Section 9, first paragraph: > > s/"EVRCB, EVRCB0"/"EVRCB and EVRCB0" OK > > Section 10, title: > > s/attributs/attributes OK About to submit version -04 Thanks, Hari _______________________________________________ Gen-art mailing list [email protected] https://www1.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art
