Dear all, It's a pity that there aren't enough out-spoken female members here to express herself on this discussion...:(
Out of countless women I've got to meet from Asian,American and European countries or according to what I've read in books,magazines or newspapers and have watched on TV,the roles of women have changed dramatically. No offense,so many male members here,but one thing sad to say is that men haven't adapted to the new trend as fast as women.Many women share the same view with me that men don't evolve fast enough. And that's why so many women in their late 20's in the world are still unwilling to settle down,get married or have children... They simply know that once they get married,their lives most certainly won't be better than when they are single.They need to sacrifice more than their spouses in regard to taking the challenging role as a wife,then a mother. I'm not saying that women nowadays should be selfish.I'm just saying that in order to blame women on not getting married or having children,the governments should provide a whole package of social security for babies,children,both working mothers and their husbands.So the burdens of parental life will not be solely carried by married couples who are courageous enough to bear children,and if they are still ambitious or capable of pursuing their career,it's beneficial for the ecomony of the societies,too. Women I have known and heard of,who are doctors,professors,lawyers,in managerial positions or even on the managing board are extremely flexible and multi-asking.Quite often,when they return home,their spouses' and children's well-being come first.They do all what's necessary to satisfy their family's needs. I wish all men who are fathers could swap with their wives and experience for just one day how it feels to be a career women and a caring wife and mother...;) Nice day,everyone! Claire On May 18, 4:45 pm, "NgoNam" <[email protected]> wrote: > Hi, > > Thank Rafael Shiro very much for your ideas, your contribution as well as > your stimulation. I'm very glad to know that actually ^_^ > > I don't know exactly what other people from diverse culture think about this > situation. In my own point of view, getting married is one of 3 biggest > events of any men in their life. These 3 crucial events are : number 1: to > get married, number two : to build (or to buy) a house; and the last : buying > a buffalo. In the morden world nowadays, the first two responsibilities > remain the same, yet the last one has been changed a little. It is no longer > a buffalo but a car instead (as expensive as possible ^_^). And these events > shuld be done at the right time. I think the right age for men to get married > ranges from 26 to 30 while that for women should be from 23 to 27. As girls > are often more passitive in love than men and they have a bigger responsility > for building up their family, I suppose that they should get married earlier > than men. I don't mean that men has less responsibility in their family but > women often have to spend a lot more time for their family in tasks like > doing housework, taking care of their children... > > In our culture, the main role of women is to build and maintain a warm > family, the role of men is almost making money to support all the family. > That is also one of the reasons why, according to Rafael Oshiro, men are > often afraid of women who are financially independent. I partly agree with > Rafael about this, however not all men are like this. Some have a very > open-minded; they don't limit the development of their wife because of being > afraid of losing the leading role in their family. Nevertheless wise wives > know how to satisfy their husband by not lowering their husband's role in the > family but heightening it instead. My cousin, a very successful businessman, > told me that his wife seems to be more agile than him in most stages but he > never feel sad about that because he are always proud of his logic ability. > Whenever his wife need to make any decisions, she always ask him for advices, > and in most case, she finds a better solution after asking his advices ^_^ > This is a very common situation in our society and I think it is acceptable > and reasonable. ^^ > > In the world these days, men and women are equal in terms of law, yet in > traditional culture terms, men should hold the leading role in their family. > They should be strong and sophisticated enough to drive their family over > vast difficulties and making important decision when necessary. Wife and > husband hold different significant role in a family. They should try to play > their role perfectly rather than taking the role of the another. > > That is just my point of view. What about you? what do you think about the > role of wife and husband in a family? Curiously to know your opinion ^_^ > > Best regards, > NgoNam > > > > ----- Original Message ----- > From: Rafael Oshiro > To: [email protected] > Sent: Monday, May 18, 2009 8:24 PM > Subject: [ESL Podcast] Re: At what age should women in this morden society > nowadays get married? > > Hi all! > > It's common to hear that men are afraid of women financially independent, > because women would be more powerful. The culture we grow up with says that > man has to be the leader and support the family, mainly financially. Do you > agree with that? > > I don't agree completely, but I believe the world changed and it's been > more often to see women earning more than men, since women are reaching > higher positions in great companies, in politics and so forth. > > Pln, you have a point when you say that we take about five years to be > stabilized professionally and in my point of view, when a woman or a man gets > married, they change their goals. They let their desire to invest in their > carriers in order to focus more on the family, the children, the house. > That's the reason I believe the best age to get married is when the couple > are stabilized, or about that (It's hard to know when one is stabilized, > ritgh? LOL). > > Great topic NgoNam! > > Oshiro > > On Fri, May 15, 2009 at 7:20 AM, pln471 <[email protected]> wrote: > > Hi Mam Thuy Josney and all others, > > Thuy,could you tell us why women in Vietnam should avoid getting > married specifically at the age of 23,26 or 29? > > It reminds me of what Chinese believe that it's bad luck to get > married or even celebrate their birthdays when they reach the 9th of > their ages.(e.g.29,39,69,etc) > > Josney has a point there that if you have a plan to get married and > have children,then the earlier,the better! > But,I don't agree with him that you should get married in order to > share the morgages,debts or loans if you don't intend to have > children. > > To stay single and be financially independent is a wiser thing to > do...especially for a woman. > Unless whom you're about to marry is a great-catch,then that's totally > another story.Am I right,Josney?LOL > > It takes about 3 to 5 years to climb up the ladder of the > hierachy.Let's say after graduation from the university,you're about > 22,then it takes 5 years to stablize your position at the company you > work for. > Is that how Thuy thinks that women should get married at the age of > 27? > > I would rather say that they should get married 3 years after > graduation which means when they are 25,then have children when they > are 28 or before they turn 30. > > When does a woman's biological clock click?!;)If you know the > answer,then that's when she realizes it's urgent for her to find a man > to have a child/children with and spend the rest of her life with... > > Nam,your topic reminds me of the American sit-coms"FRIENDS"!;) And if > you want to know if Prince Charming and his Princess will live happily > after,you should watch another older series"THIRTY-SOMETHING"!;) > > And before I forget,Pablo,I've been too busy lately to reply to your > thread...:( > I'm afraid I'll have to do it hopefully next Monday. > I'll just say first now that you have a darlingly mischievious > daughter...playing a prank joke on you like that!LOL > I can't imagine when soon she'll be a teenager,how you're going to > cope with her cleverness,moodiness and stubborness?!;) > > Great weekend to all of us wherever we are! > Pln- Hide quoted text - > > - Show quoted text - --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "ESL Podcast". 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