Hi, I did a thorough very trough read of draft-ietf-emu-aka-pfs-07. I found several minor things that I think should be fixed:
- Fixed all names with non-ascii characters including my own. -07 dispays non-ascii characters in some of the references wrongly. - I fixed all the idnits (to long rows and not mentioning update in abstract). - Fixed the xml code for the references. They generated weird output when using the lastest version of xml2rfc. - Added a formal reference to 3GPP TS 33.501 - Added proper figure captions and use of align center - Reformated and aligned the figures. They used different horizontal and vertical spacing. No technical changes to the figures. They now use the full width. - Renamed the new "Key Derivation Function" field "FS Key Derivation Function" in AT_KDF_FS to avoid confusion with the existing field. - Split the quite long security considerations section into subsections. - Removed mention of (R)UIM and added more explanation of USIM and SIM card. R)UIM has been superceeded by CSIM on UICC. - Added that requirements for generation, validation, and processing depends on the curve. - Added missing point validation for P-256 - Fixed some incorrect references to elliptic curve crypto. - Processing “start again after validation falilure” apply to all curves. - Added privacy-friendly to several places to align with the requirement in -07 - Added section on Unprotected Data and Privacy to align with BCP on pervasive monitoring. - Added section on Post-Quantum Considerations. This section also describes that EAP-AKA’ FS can easily in the future be expanded with PQC KEMs. - One issue I found is that the interactions between AT_KDF and AT_KDF_AT are not specified. The Specification is clear on how to derive keys when AT_KDF in {1} and AT_KDF_FS in {1,2} but does not give any descriptions on how other future combinations are supposed to work. For example, what happens if someone registers AT_KDF = 2? https://github.com/emu-wg/eap-aka-pfs/issues/25 Currently suggested changes can be found on GitHub https://github.com/emu-wg/eap-aka-pfs A Diff can be found here: https://www.ietf.org//rfcdiff?url1=https://www.ietf.org/archive/id/draft-ietf-emu-aka-pfs-07.txt&url2=https://raw.githubusercontent.com/emu-wg/eap-aka-pfs/master/draft-ietf-emu-aka-pfs-latest.txt<https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url1=https://www.ietf.org/archive/id/draft-ietf-emu-aka-pfs-07.txt&url2=https://raw.githubusercontent.com/emu-wg/eap-aka-pfs/master/draft-ietf-emu-aka-pfs-latest.txt> This current changes on GitHub includes a solution to #25 but I not sure that it is the correct solution. I have not discussed with Jari yet. Comments on anything above is welcome. I expect that we will submit -08 quite soon after vacation. As discussed at IETF 114, the plan is to progress the draft during fall. Cheers, John
_______________________________________________ Emu mailing list Emu@ietf.org https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/emu