It's no longer happening, and I'm not sure why. At this point, I think you can close the bug. I'm pretty sure it's not an apache issue.
For curiosities sake: I had tracked it down to something in php5 startup on reload: Breakpoint 1, 0x00007fefdb992180 in php_module_startup () from /usr/lib/apache2/modules/libphp5.so (gdb) call (char*) getenv("APACHE_LOCK_DIR") $1 = 0xffffffffdfa36a50 <Address 0xffffffffdfa36a50 out of bounds> (gdb) bt #0 0x00007fefdb992180 in php_module_startup () from /usr/lib/apache2/modules/libphp5.so #1 0x00007fefdbaa24d5 in ?? () from /usr/lib/apache2/modules/libphp5.so #2 0x00007fefdbaa30c3 in ?? () from /usr/lib/apache2/modules/libphp5.so #3 0x00007fefdf52ff71 in ap_run_post_config () #4 0x00007fefdf510dc7 in main () (gdb) c Continuing. Breakpoint 2, 0x00007fefdb9f7070 in zend_startup_modules () from /usr/lib/apache2/modules/libphp5.so (gdb) call (char*) getenv("APACHE_LOCK_DIR") $2 = 0x0 (gdb) bt #0 0x00007fefdb9f7070 in zend_startup_modules () from /usr/lib/apache2/modules/libphp5.so #1 0x00007fefdb992915 in php_module_startup () from /usr/lib/apache2/modules/libphp5.so #2 0x00007fefdbaa24d5 in ?? () from /usr/lib/apache2/modules/libphp5.so #3 0x00007fefdbaa30c3 in ?? () from /usr/lib/apache2/modules/libphp5.so #4 0x00007fefdf52ff71 in ap_run_post_config () #5 0x00007fefdf510dc7 in main () (gdb) q So, I thought I would build a debug version of libapache2-mod-php5, so I could step through. I installed the build-deps (which upgraded several of my existing packages), and then I installed the current unstable version to verify that the release version was still causing problems. At this point, reloading worked; I downgraded the php packages back to what I had originally; and that also had no problems with reloading. I hypothesize that one of the libraries I upgraded when I installed build-deps must have had a bug that was wiping out the environment, but I don't think I'm going to try to figure out which one. :( Thanks for your time!