> Robert Seeberger <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > From: "Deborah Harrell" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > > > Robert Seeberger wrote:
<snip> > > > My personal experience tells me that 40-60% of > women I have dated were > > > Bi (to varying degrees) and I would suspect the > > > numbers are similar for men. > > > Male homosexuality is suppressed in our society > > > to the degree that > > > male bisexuals either hide their sexuality or > > > never act on it. > > >From my set of women friends, a "bi" percentage of > > ~50% is far too high (even counting "to varying > > degrees"), and ditto for the men friends. Even > 20% is > > generous; of course, it's also not a question that > >we typically ask each other, so I could be way off. > ;} > Its pretty obvious that you are using a very > standard set of > definitions and parameters to define sexuality and I > respect that. Its > a language most of us know well and can speak with > ease. But I think that language is slowly losing > relevance. Yep, pretty standard...I wasn't even *aware* of the existence of homosexuality until college, and didn't have openly gay friends until later. (Combination of being rather sheltered, and the times/place: Baton Rouge in the late 70's -- now if it had been New Orleans, I might have been less callow!) > If sexuality is indeed a continuum, the regimented > definitions and > binary parameters most commonly used are not very > effective at > describing what people feel and do in their sexual > life. > > In conventional terms a person who has never had a > homosexual > experience might be considered a heterosexual, even > if they have > homosexual or bisexual mastrubatory fantasies. Using > a continuum form > of seeing this matter, such persons would not be > considered a "pure" heterosexual. Sounds reasonable. > In such terms people are not pigeonholed into 2 or 3 > sexual > catagories, but are described by where they fall on > an X - Y axis. And > if I understand correctly, there is also a W - Z > axis that describes > frequency of sex with either males or females. (Or > something to that > effect. I'm not real conversant on sociology issues > TBH) You appear more conversant with them than I. :) <snip> > >True intimacy, > > or moments of intimacy, tend to be very intense > from > > an emotional standpoint, and "emotional intensity > > = sexual attraction" seems to be another equation > >that we often use, rightly or wrongly. > True, but I don't see what that has to do with the > current discussion, > unless you see an interesting tangent you want to > pursue!<G> I do think it relevent -- but no tangent other than the below- > >As young women, > > most of us are taught to "be careful of sending the > > wrong signal to a young man," and this leads to > > certain inhibitions in interactions with men, but > > not with women. <snip> > > I think a large part of the whole > > 'college lesbian experimentation' is an outgrowth > of this situation: intimacy is experienced/practiced > with > > women-friends, and can become confused with sexual > > attraction. OTOH, it's also a sure-fire way of > > avoiding pregnancy while being sexually active... > But Debbi, one cannot willingly violate ones own > sexuality. > No woman could experiment with same-sex modes unless > they some > predilection for bisexuality, even if they are only > seeking intimacy. > AFAICT any claim to the contrary can be explained > away as denial. I wasn't trying to imply a violation at all, only to find a partial explanation for some friends who had college lesbian relationships, yet later married men and happily raised families (going on 8 years of AFAIK monogamous partnerships). My understanding of bisexual is that one continues to have sexual relations with both genders...but perhaps this is incorrect, as one brineller has already mostly stated? These friends say "Oh, I used to...but not now." Since I accepted their prior status, I don't think they'd have much reason to prevaricate with me. > xponent > You Can Come Out Of The Closet Now Maru > <G> <G> back at ya! No interesting tidbits in my past of that nature, yet I did allow "95% hetero...had I been raised in a radically different society" b/c I do agree that orientation is a continuum; I think it's primarily gene-influenced but certainly there is environmental impact as well. Debbi whose fantasy lovers all have Y-chromosomes -- and the appendages thereunto-attached... <tiny grin & a bit of a blush> __________________________________ Do you Yahoo!? Yahoo! Mail SpamGuard - Read only the mail you want. http://antispam.yahoo.com/tools _______________________________________________ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
