----- Original Message ----- From: "Jan Coffey" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> To: "Killer Bs Discussion" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> Sent: Sunday, June 15, 2003 5:43 PM Subject: Re: Interpreting language (was RE: A friendly request JVB)
> While every person must be responsible for their own actions, and while it is > sometimes necisary to simply allow others who are more skilled at phrasology > and spin to manipulate a situation, while it may be better to simply let > another win an argumant than start an incident, it certainly is also > dispicable for someone who is fully skilled at such manipulations to push > someone who isn't's buttons when they know full well what they will get as a > response. Huh? Jeroen is the one of the very best manipulators that I have ever seen in almost 50 years. I thought I"ve seen some pro's in the past, but he takes the cake. Let me state it simply: Death threats are not a normal reaction to reading posts one doesn't like. Death threats should not be dismissed. If someone is put on moderation after many warnings, hacking a computer is not a reasonable response. I am married to a psychotheripist who has specialized in abuse. I've asked her questions, as a sanity check. His behavior is deffiniately the problem. Her criticism has been, for months, that we spent too much time buying into his dsyfunctional behavior. IMHO, you are not only hurting the situation with Jerone, you are hurting him. One of the worst things you can do for a person who exhibits this type of behavior is reward it. It helps no-one. Indeed, its such a well recognized problem that there are two names for the type of behavior: enabling and co-dependant. Dan M. > It doesn't make the response anyones elses fualt but the one who took that > response, but I for one still find it just as much a disruption. > > > > > If the guy is not mentally ill, he acts like he is. > > I think many people would if they felt they were pushed into a corner. I > don't believe he is mentaly ill, but he might be. Does it really make any > diffence? > > > He needs to > > _immediately_ quit monitoring this list, > > Why? > > > take down his "Wall of Shame", > > That would help. > > > quit sending unsolicited messages off-list, > > I believe he would if he was never spoken of again on list. > > >and get some professional > > help. > > You know, you don't know that he isn't. Besides there is no reason to try and > be abusive. If you really think or feel that way, why must you say it? > Otherwise it's just an attack. > > >And that is the most truly friendly request I or anyone here can > > make of him. > > > > I supported him as long as I could, hoping he would truly change his ways > > and would not have to be banned from the list. As I said in my off-list > > message, those were among the flood of messages he sent when it was made > > clear that he was indeed going to be banned, which was only after nearly a > > full year of an ever-worsening situation. His actions in the past eight > > weeks do not suggest that he has changed one bit. > > > > End of discussion as far as I am concerned. > > Fine, you had your say. > > How far down does one have to go, before you let them starT to climb back up? > > Can we all just agree to his proposal and end this thing? > > ===== > _________________________________________________ > Jan William Coffey > _________________________________________________ > > __________________________________ > Do you Yahoo!? > SBC Yahoo! DSL - Now only $29.95 per month! > http://sbc.yahoo.com > _______________________________________________ > http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l > _______________________________________________ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
