Hi John, Thank you for the quick update! We note that the SVG also has clipped descenders, so we are checking whether a fix is forthcoming before publishing the RFC (see https://github.com/ietf-tools/xml2rfc/issues/1223). Thank you for your patience as we work through these issues.
The current files are available here: https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9768.txt https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9768.html https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9768.pdf https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9768.xml Thanks, RFC Editor/sg > On Feb 27, 2025, at 12:40 AM, John Mattsson <john.matts...@ericsson.com> > wrote: > > Hi Sandy, > > Attached is an xml file where the SVG for figure 2 has been corrected. > > Cheers, > John > > From: Sandy Ginoza <sgin...@staff.rfc-editor.org> > Date: Wednesday, 26 February 2025 at 23:44 > To: Jari Arkko <jari.ar...@gmail.com> > Cc: Madison Church <mchu...@staff.rfc-editor.org>, Karl Norrman > <karl.norr...@ericsson.com>, John Mattsson <john.matts...@ericsson.com>, > Megan Ferguson <mfergu...@staff.rfc-editor.org>, RFC Editor > <rfc-edi...@rfc-editor.org>, emu-...@ietf.org <emu-...@ietf.org>, > emu-cha...@ietf.org<emu-cha...@ietf.org>, pe...@akayla.com > <pe...@akayla.com>, paul.wout...@aiven.io <paul.wout...@aiven.io>, > auth48archive@rfc-editor.org<auth48archive@rfc-editor.org> > Subject: Re: AUTH48: RFC-to-be 9678 <draft-ietf-emu-aka-pfs-12> for your > review > > [You don't often get email from sgin...@staff.rfc-editor.org. Learn why this > is important at https://aka.ms/LearnAboutSenderIdentification ] > > Authors, > > I meant to also ask if it’s possible to update the SVG for figure 2. > Currently the PDF and HTML have a circle over the text in one of the upper > boxes and the second vertical line in the last box extends into the text box. > > Please see Figure 2 in these files: > https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678.html%23figure-2&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595663557%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=Ta2ImhSeLbHTluO%2Breu73NEK%2FXGX1ZaXBaLMW74hiEc%3D&reserved=0 > https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678.pdf&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595686044%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=LzKcHIpvS2IZKo6Xzpiz90FsKOWC9Jw75iPRzxWcKRM%3D&reserved=0 > > Thanks, > RFC Editor/sg > > > > > On Feb 26, 2025, at 1:05 PM, Sandy Ginoza <sgin...@staff.rfc-editor.org> > > wrote: > > > > Hi all, > > > > Please note that publication of this document is being delayed while we try > > to understand what is causing figure 2 in the PDF to run off the page. > > > > See > > https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678.pdf&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595699096%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=QehtvdHsUnFfI0qMxgidZxz%2FqLfg1aTQdh54Nn5y2Ig%3D&reserved=0 > > > > We can scale it, but we’re looking into it a bit more because it becomes > > pretty small. > > > > See > > https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fv3test%2Ftest9678.pdf&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595710208%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=6H4Kb8UjbJOgWSYVU1HhqLbK10QGBjCIXH8K6bMBk%2BQ%3D&reserved=0 > > > > Thanks, > > RFC Editor/sg > > > > > > > >> On Feb 16, 2025, at 6:24 AM, Jari Arkko <jari.ar...@gmail.com> wrote: > >> > >> Hi, > >> > >> Sorry for the delay, but today I finally had a chance to read the document > >> from top to bottom, and I have no issues. I approve publication in the > >> current state! > >> > >> Jari > >> > >>> Madison Church <mchu...@staff.rfc-editor.org> kirjoitti 10.2.2025 kello > >>> 19.24: > >>> > >>> Hi Jari, > >>> > >>> This is a friendly weekly reminder that this document awaits your > >>> approval. Please see the thread below for links to the current version > >>> and let us know if we can be of assistance as you complete your AUTH48 > >>> review. Once we receive your approval, we will move this document forward > >>> in the publication process. > >>> > >>> Thank you! > >>> > >>> RFC Editor/mc > >>> > >>>> On Feb 3, 2025, at 4:14 PM, Megan Ferguson > >>>> <mfergu...@staff.rfc-editor.org> wrote: > >>>> > >>>> Hi Jari, > >>>> > >>>> Just a friendly reminder that this document awaits your approval. > >>>> Please see the mail below for links to the current version and let us > >>>> know if we can be of assistance as you complete your AUTH48 review. > >>>> > >>>> Thank you. > >>>> > >>>> RFC Editor/mf > >>>> > >>>> > >>>>> On Jan 22, 2025, at 12:15 PM, Megan Ferguson > >>>>> <mfergu...@staff.rfc-editor.org> wrote: > >>>>> > >>>>> Hi John, > >>>>> > >>>>> Thanks for sending this along. > >>>>> > >>>>> We have adopted this version in our links below. Note that these > >>>>> changes are not viewable in diffs of the text files from the previous > >>>>> version to this one as they are “behind the scenes”, so we have created > >>>>> diffs between the xml files to capture them below. Please review the > >>>>> xml version and ensure it looks as expected and let us know if any > >>>>> further changes are necessary. > >>>>> > >>>>> We believe once we hear approval from Jari that this document will be > >>>>> ready to move forward in the publication process. > >>>>> > >>>>> The files have been posted here (please refresh): > >>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678.txt&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595720900%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=KS4DIuYss870QQqieE3goVuhcDAM%2BY7rzWkxujXk4Vg%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678.pdf&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595731941%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=qWTTbjhgXW%2BTzmVJ6WJN7C%2BkHQHyIN6kk%2B7p7EMUaT8%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595742654%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=x6d0c5Ji31x5W9nTKgGVhSsvdjBMs8opBaN8MhJKq0M%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678.xml&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595753139%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=X0m5%2BpDJ15DMlmRuVY5Q7bgFig7mqU5%2BqD93FwjPdFE%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>> > >>>>> The diff files have been posted here (please refresh): > >>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-diff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595763779%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=CMiLvvH4r1TJg6WuH92sCT3slCC11WGOjAEftegj0YE%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>> (cumulative) > >>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-rfcdiff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595774396%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=ohtoyrYzFqJqSQ4jOiEK979Eyd63Ur4gwgTfi%2BBEX3A%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>> (side by side) > >>>>> > >>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-auth48diff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595785331%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=m9cltydCseys474M6zfy5%2BPstdIqBmWUId18ZZwsJEw%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>> (AUTH48 changes only) > >>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-auth48rfcdiff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595795993%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=GsiYwdTSXQSxkFRqQznyoLmS5g0rWKuCbkqwqKdAMDs%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>> (side by side) > >>>>> > >>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-lastdiff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595806876%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=nKmrBG4h2Ks6dLCB81TwjOJqxPRLk4Pia9v87mWV%2Fbc%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>> (changes last version to this) > >>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-lastrfcdiff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595817520%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=n%2BiiN7K1rEnTDwBhuaaSjPMoQTsdgOom8dMyfbbBjrY%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>> (side by side) > >>>>> > >>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-xmldiff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595828129%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=EkIZ2fp3S7A1YukMSsbEryYwXwWz1L4%2BZFOKH9sXGSU%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>> (xml files last to this) > >>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-xmlrfcdiff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595841612%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=Cch4co2CsdgEK1RnfB4ZZLwxuFL8tUiRPZBJLeBQntE%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>> (side by side) > >>>>> > >>>>> The AUTH48 status page for this document is available here: > >>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauth48%2Frfc9678&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595854979%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=14LdWfy2ikPUG8cDemqtRhJ0ddwb7e9Mw6oz32FHYY4%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>> > >>>>> Thank you. > >>>>> > >>>>> RFC Editor/mf > >>>>> > >>>>> > >>>>>> On Jan 18, 2025, at 3:49 AM, John Mattsson > >>>>>> <john.matts...@ericsson.com> wrote: > >>>>>> > >>>>>> Thanks Megan, > >>>>>> > >>>>>> Attached is an updated xml file with SVG artwork updated to match the > >>>>>> updated ASCII artwork. The only changes are in <artwork type="svg" > >>>>>> > >>>>>> Cheers, > >>>>>> John > >>>>>> > >>>>>> From: Megan Ferguson <mfergu...@staff.rfc-editor.org> > >>>>>> Date: Thursday, 9 January 2025 at 17:36 > >>>>>> To: Karl Norrman <karl.norr...@ericsson.com>, John Mattsson > >>>>>> <john.matts...@ericsson.com>, jari.ar...@gmail.com > >>>>>> <jari.ar...@gmail.com> > >>>>>> Cc: rfc-edi...@rfc-editor.org <rfc-edi...@rfc-editor.org>, > >>>>>> emu-...@ietf.org <emu-...@ietf.org>, emu-cha...@ietf.org > >>>>>> <emu-cha...@ietf.org>, pe...@akayla.com <pe...@akayla.com>, > >>>>>> paul.wout...@aiven.io <paul.wout...@aiven.io>, > >>>>>> auth48archive@rfc-editor.org<auth48archive@rfc-editor.org>,jari.ar...@piuha.net > >>>>>> <jari.ar...@piuha.net> > >>>>>> Subject: Re: AUTH48: RFC-to-be 9678 <draft-ietf-emu-aka-pfs-12> for > >>>>>> your review > >>>>>> > >>>>>> [You don't often get email from mfergu...@staff.rfc-editor.org. Learn > >>>>>> why this is important athttps://aka.ms/LearnAboutSenderIdentification ] > >>>>>> > >>>>>> Hi Karl and John, > >>>>>> > >>>>>> Thank you for your replies. We have updated your status to “Approved” > >>>>>> at the AUTH48 status page > >>>>>> (seehttps://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauth48%2Frfc9678&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595872328%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=BnIVeYAQTEEaZ4jGM6lPSk5h%2B8cj7E3wD%2BtQgxy3LgU%3D&reserved=0). > >>>>>> We will await approval from Jari as well as any necessary > >>>>>> re-rendering of the SVG prior to moving forward in the publication > >>>>>> process. > >>>>>> > >>>>>> Please note that we will assume your assent to any further changes > >>>>>> submitted by your coauthors unless we hear objection at that time. > >>>>>> > >>>>>> Thank you. > >>>>>> > >>>>>> RFC Editor/mf > >>>>>> > >>>>>> > >>>>>>> On Jan 9, 2025, at 3:48 AM, Karl Norrman <karl.norr...@ericsson.com> > >>>>>>> wrote: > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> Hi! > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> I approve publication. > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> BR Karl > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> From: John Mattsson <john.matts...@ericsson.com> > >>>>>>> Sent: Thursday, January 9, 2025 11:00 AM > >>>>>>> To: Megan Ferguson <mfergu...@staff.rfc-editor.org> > >>>>>>> Cc: Jari Arkko <jari.ar...@gmail.com>; Karl Norrman > >>>>>>> <karl.norr...@ericsson.com>; rfc-edi...@rfc-editor.org; > >>>>>>> emu-...@ietf.org; emu-cha...@ietf.org; Peter Yee <pe...@akayla.com>; > >>>>>>> Paul Wouters <paul.wout...@aiven.io>; auth48archive@rfc-editor.org; > >>>>>>> Jari Arkko <jari.ar...@piuha.net> > >>>>>>> Subject: Re: AUTH48: RFC-to-be 9678 <draft-ietf-emu-aka-pfs-12> for > >>>>>>> your review > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> Mi Megan, > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> I approve publication. > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> Cheers, > >>>>>>> John > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> From: Megan Ferguson <mfergu...@staff.rfc-editor.org> > >>>>>>> Date: Wednesday, 8 January 2025 at 19:37 > >>>>>>> To: John Mattsson <john.matts...@ericsson.com> > >>>>>>> Cc: Jari Arkko <jari.ar...@gmail.com>, Karl Norrman > >>>>>>> <karl.norr...@ericsson.com>, rfc-edi...@rfc-editor.org > >>>>>>> <rfc-edi...@rfc-editor.org>, emu-...@ietf.org <emu-...@ietf.org>, > >>>>>>> emu-cha...@ietf.org <emu-cha...@ietf.org>, Peter Yee > >>>>>>> <pe...@akayla.com>, Paul Wouters <paul.wout...@aiven.io>, > >>>>>>> auth48archive@rfc-editor.org <auth48archive@rfc-editor.org>, Jari > >>>>>>> Arkko <jari.ar...@piuha.net> > >>>>>>> Subject: Re: AUTH48: RFC-to-be 9678 <draft-ietf-emu-aka-pfs-12> for > >>>>>>> your review > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> [You don't often get email from mfergu...@staff.rfc-editor.org. Learn > >>>>>>> why this is important athttps://aka.ms/LearnAboutSenderIdentification > >>>>>>> ] > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> Hi John, > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> [Note that this email is coming to you from a new email address on > >>>>>>> our end.] > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> Thanks for reviewing and sending along these changes. We have > >>>>>>> updated as requested*. > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> *Note that we made one further change to your suggestion for Section > >>>>>>> 4.1: we made “goal” singular into “goals” plural. > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> Please review the files carefully as we do not make changes after > >>>>>>> publication. > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> The files have been posted here (please refresh): > >>>>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678.txt&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595889415%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=rReTBwtTBbmc1fBCXQN4OUQoGV8M9AdjGkj7KzruCt0%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>>>> 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https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678.xml&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595940162%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=sgMaJ6y%2FKSUVX7XRgIUaJ0rw7wbWpAUPweOo7tQkw10%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> The relevant diff files have been posted here (please refresh): > >>>>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-diff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595953583%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=Hy%2BRFdubj34tM4JCoFbXmWzltz7KNrfObDpH1HvgwWw%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>>>> (comprehensive diff) > >>>>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-auth48diff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595964289%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=L7BP%2BTmUciwi0WetZOkGRWbw%2FAgZ2zVoYdac0tz15Hk%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>>>> (AUTH48 changes only) > >>>>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-lastdiff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595975301%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=Wd4YhVmtR3hMeQms1hp0GADeq1POagdMIV6f8nI%2BFWs%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>>>> (last version to this) > >>>>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-lastrfcdiff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066595986249%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=gAMhmecELTVFcVUkqoAb%2BsylVpAQP%2BSB8F%2FjrscUI%2FM%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>>>> (ditto but rfcdiff) > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> Please contact us with any further updates/questions/comments you may > >>>>>>> have. > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> We will await approvals from each of the parties listed on the AUTH48 > >>>>>>> status page prior to moving forward to publication. > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> The AUTH48 status page for this document is available here: > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauth48%2Frfc9678&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066596001070%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=G05Wcjm8h4m8XrKV47%2BOABKP5MFWNOj8Bv0T0o7A1ks%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> Thank you. > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> RFC Editor/mf > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> On Dec 28, 2024, at 3:42 AM, John Mattsson > >>>>>>>> <john.matts...@ericsson.com> wrote: > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> Hi, > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> *General Note*: Please note that any updates made to figures with > >>>>>>>>> SVG have been made in the <artwork> only. The > >>>>>>>>> authors will need to re-render the SVG to match the desired output. > >>>>>>>>> We recommend doing this once AUTH48 > >>>>>>>>> changes are complete and all author approvals have been received so > >>>>>>>>> that many iterations can be avoided. > >>>>>>>> I will re-render the SVG once AUTH48 changes are complete. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> I have reviewed the current version of the document and approve > >>>>>>>> publication. See minor suggestions below: > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> Cheers, > >>>>>>>> John > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> --- > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> OLD: > >>>>>>>> This prevents an attacker who has > >>>>>>>> gained access to the long-term key from obtaining session keys > >>>>>>>> established in the past, assuming these have been properly deleted. > >>>>>>>> NEW: > >>>>>>>> This prevents an attacker who has > >>>>>>>> gained access to the long-term key from obtaining session keys > >>>>>>>> established in the past. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> John: To align with introduction. Deletion of keys is discussed in > >>>>>>>> several sections. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> --- > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> OLD: when a system is running. > >>>>>>>> NEW: when the system is running. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> John: To align with the bullets above > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> --- > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> OLD: > >>>>>>>> The goal of AKA is to mutually authenticate the USIM and the so- > >>>>>>>> called home environment, which is the authentication Server in the > >>>>>>>> subscriber's home operator's network. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> NEW: > >>>>>>>> The goal of AKA is to mutually authenticate the USIM and the so- > >>>>>>>> called home environment, which is the authentication Server in the > >>>>>>>> subscriber's home operator's network, and to establish key material > >>>>>>>> between the two. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> --- > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> OLD: > >>>>>>>> AT_PUB_ECDHE: > >>>>>>>> This is set to 152 by IANA. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> NEW: > >>>>>>>> AT_PUB_ECDHE: > >>>>>>>> This is set to 152. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> John: The "by IANA" is just confusing > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> --- > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> OLD: > >>>>>>>> AT_KDF_FS: > >>>>>>>> This is set to 153 by IANA. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> OLD: > >>>>>>>> AT_KDF_FS: > >>>>>>>> This is set to 153. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> --- > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> OLD: > >>>>>>>> Public key validation requirements are defined in Section 5 of > >>>>>>>> [SP-800-56A]. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> NEW: > >>>>>>>> Requirements are defined in Section 5 of [SP-800-56A], in particular > >>>>>>>> Sections 5.6.2.3.4, 5.6.3.1, and > >>>>>>>> and 5.6.3.3. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> John: Section 5 is long. I think it is good to help the reader a bit. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> --- > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> OLD: > >>>>>>>> 6.5.9. EAP-Response/AKA'-Client-Error > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> changes, except that the AT_KDF_FS or AT_PUB_ECDHE attributes MUST > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> NEW: > >>>>>>>> 6.5.9. EAP-Response/AKA'-Client-Error > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> There are no changes for the EAP-Response/AKA'-Client-Error, except > >>>>>>>> that the AT_KDF_FS or AT_PUB_ECDHE attributes MUST > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> --- > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> OLD: > >>>>>>>> 6.5.11. EAP-Response/AKA'-Notification > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> There are no changes for the EAP-Request/AKA'-Notification. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> NEW: > >>>>>>>> 6.5.11. EAP-Response/AKA'-Notification > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> There are no changes for the EAP-Response/AKA'-Notification. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> --- > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> OLD: > >>>>>>>> [TS.33.501] > >>>>>>>> 3GPP, "Security architecture and procedures for 5G > >>>>>>>> System", Version 18.1.0, 3GPP TS 33.501, March 2023. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> NEW: > >>>>>>>> [TS.33.501] > >>>>>>>> 3GPP, "Security architecture and procedures for 5G > >>>>>>>> System", Version 19.0.0, 3GPP TS 33.501, September 2024. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> John: We should refer to the last version > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> --- > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> From: Megan Ferguson <mfergu...@amsl.com> > >>>>>>>> Date: Friday, 20 December 2024 at 21:57 > >>>>>>>> To: Jari Arkko <jari.ar...@gmail.com>, Karl Norrman > >>>>>>>> <karl.norr...@ericsson.com> > >>>>>>>> Cc: rfc-edi...@rfc-editor.org <rfc-edi...@rfc-editor.org>, John > >>>>>>>> Mattsson <john.matts...@ericsson.com>,emu-...@ietf.org > >>>>>>>> <emu-...@ietf.org>, emu-cha...@ietf.org <emu-cha...@ietf.org>, Peter > >>>>>>>> Yee <pe...@akayla.com>, Paul Wouters <paul.wout...@aiven.io>, > >>>>>>>> auth48archive@rfc-editor.org<auth48archive@rfc-editor.org>, Jari > >>>>>>>> Arkko <jari.ar...@piuha.net> > >>>>>>>> Subject: Re: AUTH48: RFC-to-be 9678 <draft-ietf-emu-aka-pfs-12> for > >>>>>>>> your review > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> Jari and Karl, > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> Thank you for your replies. Please see our (several) > >>>>>>>> questions/comments regarding your responses inline in the message > >>>>>>>> below marked with [rfced] for places in which further guidance from > >>>>>>>> authors may be necessary or where confirmation and careful review of > >>>>>>>> our updates is requested. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> *General Note*: Please note that any updates made to figures with > >>>>>>>> SVG have been made in the <artwork> only. The authors will need to > >>>>>>>> re-render the SVG to match the desired output. We recommend doing > >>>>>>>> this once AUTH48 changes are complete and all author approvals have > >>>>>>>> been received so that many iterations can be avoided. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> All other changes have been incorporated into our version of the > >>>>>>>> files as requested. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> Please review the files carefully as we do not make changes after > >>>>>>>> publication. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> The files have been posted here (please refresh): > >>>>>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678.txt&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066596011999%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=8Hj08tOgekXPwXEGjey6LP9F%2FVygBOwOs%2Bfjt5zpnI0%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678.pdf&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066596022607%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=jXmKRrKD1LYr77eGXi0EwjkpZ7re%2BFaIdxwGGd6RgDg%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066596033020%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=VPv0NvPvPDqi0DeE7%2FOxz%2FHjYu6B4xbo6la%2BA3xLytw%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678.xml&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066596043437%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=ezL7%2BZ41OZHYhzErohASwyaOpRjEqCMjxoGtvv8zeas%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> The relevant diff files have been posted here (please refresh): > >>>>>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-diff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066596054096%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=6RXRchrwN5kZK7BClAuELV10N4CxXHBgpRbApsF4eV8%3D&reserved=0(comprehensive > >>>>>>>> diff) > >>>>>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauthors%2Frfc9678-auth48diff.html&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066596064519%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=%2BB1Krb3SdzQOX0QgvMHXs%2Fd9Miwp1v5xchwhfO3Zw%2BI%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>>>>> (AUTH48 changes only) > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> Please contact us with any further updates/questions/comments you > >>>>>>>> may have. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> We will await approvals from each of the parties listed on the > >>>>>>>> AUTH48 status page prior to moving forward to publication. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> The AUTH48 status page for this document is available here: > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> https://eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.rfc-editor.org%2Fauth48%2Frfc9678&data=05%7C02%7Cjohn.mattsson%40ericsson.com%7C70fc77698a4a4d6dc4be08dd56b706b2%7C92e84cebfbfd47abbe52080c6b87953f%7C0%7C0%7C638762066596074922%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=fFDD%2BzyMHZ814EO2fzQCNsPZmNU%2B%2BN03Z0we4uVArXM%3D&reserved=0 > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> Thank you. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> RFC Editor/mf > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> On Dec 13, 2024, at 8:54 AM, Jari Arkko <jari.ar...@gmail.com> > >>>>>>>>> wrote: > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> Trying to answer the questions: > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> 1) <!-- [rfced] We had a few questions about the title of this > >>>>>>>>>> document, > >>>>>>>>>> mostly as relates to the expansion of the initialism EAP-AKA'. > >>>>>>>>>> We would love some guidance that we can track for future > >>>>>>>>>> documents using this abbreviation as it looks like this has not > >>>>>>>>>> been consistent thus far. > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> a) We believe the single quote following the abbreviation is used > >>>>>>>>>> to > >>>>>>>>>> indicate the "improved" method described in RFC 5448 (as opposed to > >>>>>>>>>> basic EAP-AKA from RFC 4187). If this is so, should "improved" be > >>>>>>>>>> added to the title of this document? > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> I think so, what do other authors think? > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> [Karl]: Yes, I think naming it “Forward Security for the Improved > >>>>>>>> Extensible…” would be the correct name and in line with 5448. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> b) We see past expansions of both EAP-AKA and EAP-AKA' in RFC > >>>>>>>>>> titles > >>>>>>>>>> include 3rd Generation or 3GPP Mobile Network. Should some > >>>>>>>>>> mention of > >>>>>>>>>> 3rd generation be added to the title of this document? > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> RFC 4187: > >>>>>>>>>> Extensible Authentication Protocol Method for 3rd Generation > >>>>>>>>>> Authentication and Key Agreement (EAP-AKA) > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> RFC 5448: > >>>>>>>>>> Improved Extensible Authentication Protocol Method for > >>>>>>>>>> 3rd Generation Authentication and Key Agreement (EAP-AKA') > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> RFC 9048: > >>>>>>>>>> Improved Extensible Authentication Protocol Method for 3GPP Mobile > >>>>>>>>>> Network Authentication and Key Agreement (EAP-AKA') > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> c) If the title is really a 1:1 with the initialism, it may be > >>>>>>>>>> beneficial for the reader to move the initialism to the front > >>>>>>>>>> followed > >>>>>>>>>> by a colon (common use in RFCs) (see Perhaps A below). > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> With *all* the above in mind (a-c), here are some suggested titles. > >>>>>>>>>> If none of these fit the bill, please let us know if/how we can > >>>>>>>>>> rephrase. > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> Perhaps A: > >>>>>>>>>> Forward Secrecy Extension to the Improved Extensible > >>>>>>>>>> Authentication Protocol for Authentication and Key Agreement > >>>>>>>>>> (EAP-AKA' FS) > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> Perhaps B: > >>>>>>>>>> EAP-AKA' FS: The Forward Secrecy Extension for Improved Extensible > >>>>>>>>>> Authentication Protocol for Authentication and Key Agreement > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> Perhaps C: > >>>>>>>>>> Improved Extensible Authentication Protocol Method for 3GPP Mobile > >>>>>>>>>> Network Authentication and Key Agreement Forward Secrecy Extension > >>>>>>>>>> (EAP-AKA' FS) > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> --> > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> I personally prefer A, but I don’t have a strong opinion. Retaining > >>>>>>>>> the whole stack of content is making the title too long, imho, > >>>>>>>>> hence not preferring C. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> [Karl]: I also prefer A. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> [rfced] Please see the updated file for the adoption of suggestion A > >>>>>>>> and that also includes “Method” (which was accidentally removed in > >>>>>>>> our suggestion A we originally sent). > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> 2) <!--[rfced] The Abstract and IANA Considerations each contain > >>>>>>>>>> places > >>>>>>>>>> where an (almost) RFC title is listed for one RFC but a > >>>>>>>>>> "nickname" for another/others. How may we make these consistent? > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> Abstract: > >>>>>>>>>> This document updates RFC 9048, the improved Extensible > >>>>>>>>>> Authentication > >>>>>>>>>> Protocol Method for 3GPP Mobile Network Authentication and Key > >>>>>>>>>> Agreement (EAP-AKA'),...Similarly, this document also updates the > >>>>>>>>>> earlier version of the EAP-AKA' specification in RFC 5448. > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> IANA: > >>>>>>>>>> This extension of EAP-AKA' shares its attribute space and subtypes > >>>>>>>>>> with Extensible Authentication Protocol Method for Global System > >>>>>>>>>> for > >>>>>>>>>> Mobile Communications (GSM) Subscriber Identity Modules (EAP-SIM) > >>>>>>>>>> [RFC4186], EAP-AKA [RFC4187], and EAP-AKA' [RFC9048]. > >>>>>>>>>> --> > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> Clearly this needs to be corrected. Let’s use the full name in both. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> [rfced] In the IANA Considerations section, we have further updated > >>>>>>>> to make this a bulleted list of RFCs to aid in readability. Please > >>>>>>>> review and let us know objections. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> In the Abstract, we found expanding both very similar document > >>>>>>>> titles so close to each other actually tougher to read, so we have > >>>>>>>> updated the text differently there. Again, please let us know any > >>>>>>>> objections. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> <snip> > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> 9) <!--[rfced] Might it be helpful to the reader to point them to > >>>>>>>>>> the > >>>>>>>>>> specific 3GPP specifications to which you refer? > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> Original: > >>>>>>>>>> The details of those interactions are outside the scope of this > >>>>>>>>>> document, however, and the reader is referred to the 3GPP > >>>>>>>>>> specifications. > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> I don’t see the problem, isn’t the next sentence containing one > >>>>>>>>> such reference? > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> [Karl]: I assume this is from just above Figure 2. Maybe we could > >>>>>>>> add a reference to [TS 33.501] just for clarity. It is already > >>>>>>>> mentioned a bit higher up in the same section for another detail. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> [rfced] Please review how we have updated to try and address this > >>>>>>>> issue and let us know any objections. > >>>>>>>> <snip> > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> 12) <!--[rfced] We have some questions regarding the text below > >>>>>>>>>> from > >>>>>>>>>> Section 6.3: > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> i. This paragraph appears several paragraphs after the text it > >>>>>>>>>> describes. Would it be helpful to have this paragraph appear > >>>>>>>>>> closer to > >>>>>>>>>> the notation it defines? Or to update from "of the notation used > >>>>>>>>>> above" to instead use "of the notation used in Figure X" (and add a > >>>>>>>>>> title to the text in the <figure> tags? > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> ii. For readability, may we reformat the sentence as follows? > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> Original: > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> For readability, an explanation of the notation used above is > >>>>>>>>>> copied > >>>>>>>>>> here: [n..m] denotes the substring from bit n to m. PRF' is a new > >>>>>>>>>> pseudo-random function specified in [RFC9048]. K_encr is the > >>>>>>>>>> encryption key, 128 bits, K_aut is the authentication key, 256 > >>>>>>>>>> bits, > >>>>>>>>>> K_re is the re-authentication key, 256 bits, MSK is the Master > >>>>>>>>>> Session Key, 512 bits, and EMSK is the Extended Master Session Key, > >>>>>>>>>> 512 bits. MSK and EMSK are outputs from a successful EAP method > >>>>>>>>>> run > >>>>>>>>>> [RFC3748]. > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> Perhaps: > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> For readability, an explanation of the notation used [in Figure X?] > >>>>>>>>>> above is copied here: > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> * [n..m] denotes the substring from bit n to m. > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> * PRF' is a new pseudorandom function specified in [RFC9048]. > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> * K_encr is the encryption key (128 bits). > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> * K_aut is the authentication key (256 bits). > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> * K_re is the re-authentication key (256 bits). > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> * MSK is the Master Session Key (512 bits). > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> * EMSK is the Extended Master Session Key (512 bits). > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> Note: MSK and EMSK are outputs from a successful EAP method run > >>>>>>>>>> [RFC3748]. > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> Yes, this works. And maybe just ”An explanation .. ” (ie. omit the > >>>>>>>>> part about readability). > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> [rfced] We believe this was assent to both the update and the > >>>>>>>> movement of text. Please review how this appears in the file and > >>>>>>>> let us know any objections. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> <snip> > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> 21) <!--[rfced] "MAC" appears to be used as a verb in the sentence > >>>>>>>>>> below. Are any adjustments needed? > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> Original: > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> K_encr and K_aut are used to encrypt and MAC data in the EAP-Req/ > >>>>>>>>>> AKA'-Challenge message... > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> --> > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> Right. Maybe ”… encrypt and to calculate a MAC …” > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> [rfced] Please review our update which also removes “data” and let > >>>>>>>> us know if this is incorrect. > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> --> > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> 24) <!--[rfced] The terms RAND, AUTN, XRES, RES, IK, and CK appear > >>>>>>>>>> with > >>>>>>>>>> and without articles throughout this document (see an example > >>>>>>>>>> below). How may we update for consistency? > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> Original: > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> The authentication vector > >>>>>>>>>> contains a random part RAND, an authenticator part AUTN used for > >>>>>>>>>> authenticating the network to the USIM, an expected result part > >>>>>>>>>> XRES, a 128-bit session key for integrity check IK, and a 128-bit > >>>>>>>>>> session key for encryption CK. > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> If this process is successful (the AUTN is valid and the sequence > >>>>>>>>>> number > >>>>>>>>>> used to generate AUTN is within the correct range)... > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> --> > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> I’m not sure. Can you suggest how to do it, just based on using > >>>>>>>>> proper English? > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> [rfced] We have made the updates to the body of the text that you > >>>>>>>> can review, but have not made changes to the figures as these > >>>>>>>> situations read okay to us (since the names were not followed by a > >>>>>>>> label). Please let us know if you would like to make any updates > >>>>>>>> like the following to the figures or if you too are okay leaving > >>>>>>>> these as they are. > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> Example: > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> Current: > >>>>>>>> ...generating RAND and AUTN,… > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> Perhaps: > >>>>>>>> ...generating the RAND and AUTN values,... > >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> --> > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>> 26) <!--[rfced] Please review the <artwork> element in Section 6.3 > >>>>>>>>>> and let us know > >>>>>>>>>> if it should be updated to <sourcecode> or another element. --> > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>> It is more of ”equations” or perhaps source code than a figure, so > >>>>>>>>> if <sourcecode> is appropriate for this, then go ahead. > >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>> [rfced] Just a further pointer to the sourcecode type list in case > >>>>>>>> anything there seems like it fits. We will leave these as <artwork> > >>>>>>>> unless we hear otherwise. > >>>>>>> > >>>>>> > >>>>>> <rfc9678_JPM.xml> > >>> > >> > > > > <rfc9678_fixed_SVG.xml> -- auth48archive mailing list -- auth48archive@rfc-editor.org To unsubscribe send an email to auth48archive-le...@rfc-editor.org
